The love I lost was a heterosexual relationship between me and a girl I knew from my church. the relationship was steady, not a sexual one, but I really thought I loved her. She was beautiful in my eyes, And sometimes I still look at her and think "why did I lose her?" But I remember now... there was something missing... I did not know that I even liked a single guy back then, but if I think about it, I never really loved her. As a sister, yes, but as a lover, no. There was one day where I asked her if she loved me. My heart broke that day. But in a way, it healed all too quickly.I remember thinking "did Isaac always look that good?" I fell in love with my friend Isaac, who happened to be a BOY! I thought it would pass, but I realized "my god, I'm gay!" I was very homophobic at that time.(no one I knew of in my family was gay) I wondered what I did wrong, this must be a phase, I can't be gay, I loved a girl, it's impossible!
To be continued