Things you wanted to say out loud today...

apuffalogic's picture

...but didn't, in the interests of preserving your job, the respect of your elders, the illusion of your sanity, your teeth, etc.

For example:
"Like, OMG, there's snow? In December? In CANADA!!! NO. WAY. I bet it's COLD, too! PLEASE point that out again; I so love it when you talk about the obvious. Repeatedly. *Slap upside the head*."

Inkblot's picture

Yay

"Oh, for a flat chest and the ability to wear tight shirts."

"I wish I was taller"

"Stupid boobs"

"Stupid Target"

"Why does everything have fucking logos all over it?!"
(As you can see, shopping makes me feel short, busty and annoyed)

"Yay! I have a date tomorrow"

"Sticky"

"Stop slurping your noodles"

Do I shock you darling?
-Sally Bowles, Cabaret

runningupthefreeway's picture

*

thats ok. shopping just makes me feel fat.

Torre's picture

In mental response to my now

In mental response to my now ex's ranting:

Oh...cuz texting me repeatedly and threatening my job is going to make me talk to you.

Torre
DIEGO'S WORLD
www.angelfire.com/blog/diegoworld
Current column: Oh, But I'm a Freak!: Thoughts on Pride--What does Pride mean to me? Good question.

music is life's picture

"marry me" "Just because you

"marry me"

"Just because you don't think the way he touched me was inappropriate, doesn't mean that it didn't happen. But then again according to you I don't know what real affection is."

"Stop only hearing and seeing things you want to"

"You know those jokes you make about me being a dyke, well I really am"

"My worst fear is to be like you when I grow up."

hayden_love778899's picture

Im SOOO Sick of You

"if you want me to fuck off then i will, directly into meghan's bed, which i know you miss"

"do you really think meghan would leave me for your girlfriend? do you even think straight?!?"

"why do you act so nice when she's not around but as soon as she steps in the car your a dillhole dick"

"shes going threw a hard time and your making it worse"

"why dont you just admit that you cant live without her and make my day, instead of showing up at her sister's apartment after a week ago saying that you didnt want to talk to her, your graduating next year? gain some fucking maturity already"

hayden_love778899's picture

BTFW

dont ever call my girlfriend a rat EVER again because if you havnt looked in the mirror lately your the one who looks like a fukkn sewage rodent

When I call out Your Name Do you Hear's picture

"Half of my

"Half of my friends.....didn't even tell me happy birthday..... had to remind most everyone......"

"That's not the way it's suppose to work......I realized exactly who cares......"

"And you wonder why baby's so hairy....cause he's a werebaby!"

hayden_love778899's picture

"mom! look at that hot dyke!

"mom! look at that hot dyke! she's about your age!she's better looking than dad!"

my three wheeler rox's picture

...

"Stop Talking about her like that!"

"Yes she kissed me. Yes, I liked it."

"My God, you kissed me.. Do it again please."

What do you tell a quad rider with two black eyes?
Nothin! You alredy told 'im twice!

Neutrina's picture

"Do you ever shut

"Do you ever shut up?"

"Hi. I know we have a long, awkward romantic past and all, but will you go out with me?"

Note: They're to two different people.

"When the people begin to reason, all is lost" - Voltaire

fox333's picture

It wasn't MY idea to SLEEP

It wasn't MY idea to SLEEP twelve hours a day its just something I do and it WASN'T me who broke into our car so STOP taking it out on ME.

ZZZZZZZZZ for 12 more hours.

"I feel like Nacy Drew in the mystery of the midlife crisis."
-Roger Bannister
The Stepford Wives

Ricky-chan72's picture

To someone I'm mad at: "I

To someone I'm mad at:
"I honestly never thought you'd stoop to such a level. But you proved me wrong. You're such an ass."

To someone else:
"I'm so happy right now I could dance! Sunday's gonna be amazing <3"

----
GIR: You gonna make biscuits? You gonna make biscuits?! You gonna make biscuits?!? You gonna make biscuits?!?!
Zim: No, GIR. Never. I never want you to mention biscuits ever again.

Maux's picture

gah! you suck! okay, you

gah! you suck!

okay, you know what? you really, REALLY need to get laid. why don't you let me teach the class?

when you gonna take the stick out?

srsly, ur pissin me off!

Bisexual by nature. Absolutely fabulous by choice.

Icarus's picture

"O.M.F.G. if you're gonna

"O.M.F.G. if you're gonna audition for complex part, the LEAST you could do would be to do some RESEARCH."

"You. All. Fucking. Suck. the end."

"wtf? you're totally not my type and yet i just wanna cuddle with you..."

Leave you alone for FIVE MINUTES!

scandalboy's picture

"SHE DOESN'T LIKE YOU, STOP

"SHE DOESN'T LIKE YOU, STOP MAKING THE EFFORT!"

"Why has it been 6 months and every so often, I see you and I just melt?"

Inkblot's picture

Today:

"Please don't eat my brother's ice cream, it'll make him mad, and that will suck."

"Mmmmmmm, cheese"

"Want"

"Need. Sleep. Now"

"Why must your stupid mother who picks on my mother sleep in my room? And why is it that I must be PC about the books I leave out? MY BOOKS ARE NOT PC. Deal with it."

"Mom, please calm down. There is no conspiracy to prevent the house from being clean."

Do I shock you darling?
-Sally Bowles, Cabaret

5thstory's picture

"You're hot. And I love that

"You're hot. And I love that coat. By the way, your last commentary in Intro was totally amazing and clarifying, thanks. I mean, you're really smart, and I almost died when you gave you your extra t-shirt the day I got wet." (I wanted to kiss him after that).

" . . . The sun does not shine upon this fair earth to meet frowning eyes, depend upon it." Charles Dickens

hayden_love778899's picture

:]]

"can you really find someone's avatar cute and find them attractive threw the things they say, there sense of sarcasm the was they crush the same way you do, the non stop flirting you both do?"

to my pricincipal...
"ARE YOU FUKKN DUMB OR SOMETHING!?!?"
"IF YOUR GOING TO PUNISH ME FOR HITTING YOU THEN IM GOING TO DO IT ASSHOLE!"

"yur fukkn annoying. i dont like you"

"why the fuck am i such a pussy?"

loreonpravus's picture

Girl, ditch the chips and

Girl, ditch the chips and come with me...I'd treat you to a freakin' gourmet meal!

I like your pants. A lot. To the point where I could be convinced to rip them off your legs and run off with them.

Hey there. Um, I just want to say even though you talk about all this random shit all the time and you're kinda bitchy, and your nail polish is an irritating colour and hard on my eyes, and your casual not-serious flirting with me is causing traffic jams in the hallway because I'm standing there clogging the hall trying to hang around to look at your ass, I still kinda like you in this weird not-too-emotional-more-of-a-lust-thing way. And that really, really, REALLY isn't an insult.

Icarus's picture

AAAAAH MOTHALAND!--i was

AAAAAH MOTHALAND!--i was really tempted to just scream this as i was walking across campus. no clue why....

hey, what's your name? you doing anything tomorrow night?--cute girl in the bookstore!

omg, hug me? please...?--psyche professor. no idea why....

"She's Trouble with a capital T, that rhymes with P, that stands for Pussy."

taste the rainbow's picture

"PLEASE - NO JACKING OFF IN

"PLEASE - NO JACKING OFF IN THE POOL PLEEEEEASE"

I work at a pool. I didn't actually say it. But I was yelling it out in my head...

And I don't think he was actually jacking off, he was probably just caught in his swim trunks in some weird fashion that was uncomfortable to him...

But nonetheless, I wanted to yell...

Maux's picture

shitshitshitshitSHIT!!! are

shitshitshitshitSHIT!!!

are you insane or just STUPID?!?!?

fuck. fuck i say.

Bisexual by nature. Absolutely fabulous by choice.

Icarus's picture

"Dude, I fucking loooove

"Dude, I fucking loooove older women. I could demonstrate, you sexy, sexy beast you."

"She's Trouble with a capital T, that rhymes with P, that stands for Pussy."

Icarus's picture

"Dude, I fucking loooove

"Dude, I fucking loooove older women. I could demonstrate, you sexy, sexy beast you."

"She's Trouble with a capital T, that rhymes with P, that stands for Pussy."

5thstory's picture

"DATE ME. I swear I love

"DATE ME. I swear I love you!"

" . . . The sun does not shine upon this fair earth to meet frowning eyes, depend upon it." Charles Dickens

When I call out Your Name Do you Hear's picture

"Stupid cunt...." "And you

"Stupid cunt...."

"And you wonder why baby's so hairy....cause he's a werebaby!"

yesac's picture

Please pull out of this

Please pull out of this pathetic rebound before you get seriously hurt, and I'm going to have to come along and pick up the pieces and say "I told you so." All over again.

Inkblot's picture

Today...

"Not. Getting. Involved."

"Stupid cow. Your ass looks worse than usual in those jeans."

"Please take me home and cuddle with me, so we can not have to worry about anything and hide from the world for a little while."

"CALM DOWN"

"I want coffee."

"Sometimes I just want you to nod and say "okay" instead of actually answering me."

"Oooh, kitty!"

Do I shock you darling?
-Sally Bowles, Cabaret

Arthur's picture

A while ago...

"If you EVER call my girlfriend that again I will rip your tongue out of your face and feed it to my cat because GUESS WHAT?! You, in the end of it all, next to her, mean jack-shit to me and I couldn't give a shit less how much it would hurt you to say that your mother was a stupid fool who never taught you how to speak properly of your betters. And you better believe my girl is better than the likes of you. If I had the physical strength, I wouldn't hesitate to beat the living shit out of you. You think you have it all in your hand, don't you? You think you're so strong and mighty. Trust me. You can't match my damage. In the end, you are just a tool to me. An easily manipulated little snot of a GIRL who would never have the right to call herself a decent man, even if you did live long enough to get a SRS. And you think you know so much. Heh heh heh. Stupid fuck."

"It is ALL your fault. Every single shit thing in your life. Is. Your. Fault. And you know what I think of that? I think it is hilarious."

"Go ahead and dance with the Sadist. I've been waiting so long for this."

"Oh for fu*ks SAKE! Stop angsting and bloody well ASK ME if we can move to where Charlie's going!...Fu*king wannabe martyr."--Khaos Komix

ReinbowGrl's picture

"Does the term I hate my

"Does the term I hate my life mean anything to you?"

"I'd kill you...but then I'd have to go to prison...and I already have a girlfriend..."

- - -
Pronouns make it hard to keep our sexual orientation a secret when our co-workers ask about your weekend.
- I had a GREAT time with...them.
Yay, now they don't think you're queer, just a slut!

Lol-taire's picture

Your nan's the queen!

Your nan's the queen!

Icarus's picture

"So, ummmmm, would you be

"So, ummmmm, would you be doing anything this weekend?"

"Ohmagod, you have the most gorgeous eyes. Ever."

"JESUS HEBERT WALKER CHRIST. CALM DOWN."

"She's Trouble with a capital T, that rhymes with P, that stands for Pussy."

Riku's picture

Sora you tard-face. You said

Sora you tard-face. You said you'd introduce me as male but here I am with everyone thinking I'm a girl and it makes me want to explode.

Neutrina's picture

You are utterly adorable.

You are utterly adorable. Want to go out sometime?

"When the people begin to reason, all is lost" - Voltaire

When I call out Your Name Do you Hear's picture

"Fuck you, I fucking quit.

"Fuck you, I fucking quit. This is so not worth the stress."
"Holy shit....I may not walk......"
"Stupid bitch....I stole one of your friends. Hurts eh?"

"And you wonder why baby's so hairy....cause he's a werebaby!"

Icarus's picture

Billie Fucking Piper in

Billie Fucking Piper in period costume being a total badass? Hellz yeah, i'm watching it!

"She's Trouble with a capital T, that rhymes with P, that stands for Pussy."

Rachel_Girl's picture

Stop moping over losing her,

Stop moping over losing her, I'm write here and I think you're the most adorable intelligent thing since...ever.

Love Happens

koolaidemonster's picture

FUCK OFF, DAD. We got home

FUCK OFF, DAD. We got home at two AM last night from your bad time management, and there is NO WAY I'm catching a 6:58 bus. Call me in sick.

Riku's picture

No I don't know. Just

No I don't know. Just because half the girls here look almost as masculine as I do doesn't make me less of a boy. >_o;;;

(I was at GSA today and someone implied that I'm less of a guy than any other guy because I was born female-bodied. Pshhh.)

loreonpravus's picture

AAAAUUUGH. Is there a wiring

AAAAUUUGH. Is there a wiring problem in your brain? Because we are NOT. NOT. NOT. going to call our team "Team Jonas"!!!

Oh. Well, if you were my girlfriend, I'd probably make you soup and a tin of cookies to go with that nasty cold. But seeing as you're not, the best I can do is offer my condolences...and run away to wash my pestilent hands now. Sorry!

music is life's picture

Why him and not me?? Your

Why him and not me??

Your boobs look extra nice today.

Neutrina's picture

Miss me, damn you! "When the

Miss me, damn you!

"When the people begin to reason, all is lost" - Voltaire

-Ruby-'s picture

please get out of my room so

please get out of my room so i can masturbate.

typicalmusician's picture

Why do you look so effing

Why do you look so effing hot?

Can I kiss you?

Can you be bi? Pretty pretty please? And if you could be, could you mention it to me so I feel less like a creeper for wanting to kiss you? :P

Morgan's picture

Pet my nose, dammit!

Pet my nose, dammit!

kevintenenbaum's picture

To Ted:

Yes, I fucking love you. You're beautiful and smarter than people give you credit for, and I don't care what everyone else thinks because all I want is YOU.

Maybe I'll actually say it some day.

typicalmusician's picture

--*screaming into the sky

--*screaming into the sky after going to the movies with one of my best friends*

I WANT A BOYFRIEND TO DO THINGS WITH!!!!

--And after my roommate and former roommate (2 of my really good friends) were talking about what they'd done with boys this summer:

Well, isn't that nice. You've got guys touching your boobs when you go home every couple of weeks and I've got a girl I'm head over heels for who I see ten times a day. And every single time I want to kiss her. And I can't. And I can't get a boyfriend either. YOU SUCK. Get out.

-Ruby-'s picture

tell your fucking kids to stop splashing around in the hot-tub!

it's not my job to yell at your kids! you're a lazy-ass dad!
grrr :-S

runningupthefreeway's picture

44

yes mother, I see. There is a redlight. I see it. I really see it. Stop screaming now.

So now that I have you trapped in the elevator, I'm gay.
I don't really know why I haven't told you, just haven't gotten around to it.

Is it bad that I suddenly had an interest in the twilight books after seeing alice straddle bella in the movie? Because seriously, thats the only reason I asked to borrow the book yesterday.

jmy's picture

Me: "No, i dont have a

Me: "No, i dont have a boyfriend"
Guy: "Why not"
What i said: "Eh, just dont want one"

WHAT I WANTED TO SAY "Because im a lesbian, because guys have teh wrong bits in the wrong places, because i dont want a boyfriend... although... you could meet my girlfriend if you wnated?"