so stupid. got my hopes up.

808Chik's picture

so i got to go to work in 3 hrs. i'm not looking forward to it. lately i've been hating work, like the joy i once found in it has jus all been sucked out. idk why. & it doesnt help that people have noticed the change. i love the people interaction and my coworkers, but i feel that something is missing in my life. that now when i thought that submersing myself in work and jus trying to block out parts of my life, its catching up with me and i finally realized that...i'm not happy & i jus dont care as much now to make others happy.
as much as i dont want to admit it. my life has changed and it may have been for the worse. i want to be happy again. && i want to have something to live for. in this life that has manifested...all i feel is loneliness!

Comments

TheInsideLlama's picture

I've been searching for a

I've been searching for a job for a year now, I lost a boy I loved because I had no money to see him, I've lost friends, I've lost hope, I've lost self confidence. I'd slaughter animals if it was a job, people say shit to me about getting a job. I get it rubbed in my face that my friends are getting paid. I sometimes feel like I'm going to have to go into an HR office with a gun upto my head to get a job.

808Chik's picture

hun. dont be hard on

hun. dont be hard on yourself. you'll find a job. dont mistake this for me complaining about my job. i'm not, but a job isnt everything. yeah its good to have money and stuff but i could live without it. before i had a job and had someone i loved. i was happy but now that i have no one and i have a job...i'm missing that piece in my life i had before; that person to love. things happen for a reason. you'll find a job and find happiness. no worries!

"i am who i am, so don't judge me for being myself"

Adam A's picture

meow

u'r cute. y can't you find a job is there a problem with employment where you live? i'm asking seriousl u seem smart enough and it's not like maccas or k mart have particularly high standards (no offense to any staff, but u don't need a BA to be a checkout chick) there u have it u'd be a great checkout chick! just keep looking, maybe review u'r resume and u'll get there little llama buddy! btw getting a paycheck is not all it's cracked up to be, if u'r bf dumped you on account of u being broke than he's a shallow buttmuncher and u'r friends sound like assholes, i'd be more depressed about that than not having a job.
love ya!
(will copy paste this for u'r jounal entry)

Adam A's picture

meow

ooh babe that was sad, chin up ferret! u just need to get back into some form of romance no? just go out, how old are you? are you club age yet?? go out with friends from work that could open up new doors, try ppl you've been overlooking, it's nost just the person u get in touch with it's their whole group. and if you think too hard about u'r situation u only stand to make it worse, preoccu pie u'rself with something else that does give you some happiness and ride out this little bout of unhappiness