Worst movie of all time?

I bleed audio's picture

Like the title would suggest, what do you consider to be the worst movie of all time? What movie gets under your skin like no one's business?

please include

A) Title of movie

B) Brief explanation of movie if it isn't well known

C) What made this movie SO terrible

Yeah so here's mine

I got dragged the other night to see that "Meet the spartans" movie. This is the first movie I've ever seen that was PAINFUL to watch. The movie (and I use the term lightly) is exactly what you would expect from these spoof films and that being a random string of pop culture references that are supposed to form a loose plot. The "scary movie" series was bad but at least tollerable, this one...well I'm thinking the idea for the film went something like this.

"Hey man I really loved 300, we should definately make a movie like that (Takes a hit)"

"Yeah we could do that (Takes a hit) but we should definately include spiderman"

"Oh and the transformers, man that film rocked (Another hit)"

"Hey what about American Idol? We could definately kill the judges in the movie! Man that would be sweet! (Goes into high pitched laughter followed by coughing)"

"Oh and we could make the spartans gay (Laughter insues followed by much more pot)"

And thus the "script" for meet the spartans was created.

I know I know it's a spoof movie and I knew it was stupid going in but I didn't think it would be as terrible as it was. It kind of makes me sick that I spent $6.50 to slap Frank Miller in the face.

jeff's picture

Hmm...

A quick visit to Rotten Tomatoes could have spared you that torture.

I don't really rank things I don't like. I try to forget them.

---

"Be like a postage stamp. Stick to one thing until you get there." -- Josh Billings.

Add me on MySpace!

electricity's picture

1) The Diary of Ellen

1) The Diary of Ellen Rimbaur

2) A spin off of Stephen King's "Rose Red." It was the prelude or some shit like that. It was the crappy story of the building of a mansion that becomes haunted over night and how people go missing for no reason.

3) There are SO many missing plot lines! Why is the house haunted? A guy was shot during construction, but why? Why does the spirit pull in souls and keep them there? Why does it want the lady to stay in the house? What's the relation? Seriously! It was such a mess. Worst ghost story ever.

Disney's picture

Cabin Fever

A) Title of movie: Cabin Fever

B) Brief explanation of movie if it isn't well known: Some college students (all male-female couples and a bonus guy) on break decide to go off to a cabin that's relatively secluded. They go through a little redneck village place and wind up at their cabin. After some pointless ongoings, they kill a homeless man who is sick and he winds up falling into their water supply. Then they meet a stoner and a weird person named Dr. Mambo with a very scary dog. Then one of the girls drinks some water and starts getting sick with a fatal, sickly rash and presto, they all begin dying off. But of course, the college kids lock up the first girl to get sick in a tool shed, for the sake of their own health. Then a perverted sheriff shows up. One memorable scene was the aftermath of a couple having sex, and the boy wakes up to find the girl dead with the rash all over her, he is disgusted and goes and rinses his privates with mouthwash. The ending of the movie is not nearly as memorable. Just a waste of time.

C) What made this movie SO terrible: The plot was soooooooooo stupid, I honestly can't remember the whole thing right now but the beginning involves an old white man at the redneck village central shop and he says that he has a gun for n*ggers and the college kids get freaked and leave. After they're all DEAD (shucks, spoiled the ending), the movie goes back to the same store, some black people walk in and the man laughs and jokes with them and gives them the gun and the movie ends. There was really no point to the connection. In the end, the sheriff also kills a perfectly healthy person, dumps one of the college kids in the road instead of taking him to the hospital, and he and the rest of the department burn the cabin down to hide any evidence of an outbreak. Randomly at one point, Dr. Mambo makes his scary wolf-dog tear apart one of the girls who is disoriented from the sickness.

Why did I waste 2-3 hours watching bad actors badly kill a homeless person, not notice him DIE in their water supply, get sick, leave each other to die, and get murdered and forgotten by the local sheriff? To warn you. Oh, and the actors aren't attractive at all. Everyone that worked on this movie was a moron.

You're Amazing.

jeff's picture

Hmm...

Is this the one I watched cuz I thought I might see Rider Strong naked?

---

"Be like a postage stamp. Stick to one thing until you get there." -- Josh Billings.

Add me on MySpace!

5thstory's picture

The horror! The horror!

The horror! The horror! (Apocalypse Now).
I mean, as the guy died and said those immortal worlds, I had to say them as well. Different reasons, I just wanted to run out of the room as fast as I could, of course.

Oh, and the new Pride and Prejudice. I mean, if they wanted to make of Austen's novel something cheesy with unbearably anaesthetic images, they sure nailed it. I hated it. I almost vomited halfway through the picture. Worst of all, is that there are (and were) hundreds of good directors all over the world, and the film producers have to choose the worst, lamest, most inept ones to direct movies. I mean, one of the old neo-realism Italian directors would have done magic with those ridiculous budgets AND have money left (after making a life-changing, near to perfection picture). Damn Hollywood.

" . . . The sun does not shine upon this fair earth to meet frowning eyes, depend upon it." Charles Dickens

electricity's picture

Apocalypse Now was amazing!!

Apocalypse Now was amazing!! A little long, but my God it's wonderfully shot and told and it beats the hell out of the book it's based on. It was so well filmed I can't believe you hate it.

And Pride and Prejudice too! I liked it way more than the book and I thought it was way more well told [just as far as visuals anyway] and it was well filmed. It was bearable. Decent movie, I wouldn't mind watching it again.

Come on, man, haha

whateversexual_llama's picture

apocolypse now makes me

apocolypse now makes me giggle. There're so many references to it in "Restless," the best Buffy episode ever. "Damn this war. WHERE ARE MY MEN?"

...yeah.

But, worst movie I've ever seen: Napolean Dynamite. why? because it sucked. It wasn't funny, it was pointless, the writing sucked, the acting fit the rest of the movie; it would've been good if there'd been anything to act about.

Be yourself. 'Cause if you're busy being somebody else, who's gonna be you?

I bleed audio's picture

A subconscious thing...

I actually liked cabin fever, but not for the plot or anything. The director made it so that the cells of the movie got progressively darker so subconsciously the viewers got more scared. I just thought that was cool

-----------------------------------
Despite all the things you may have learned, if you play with fire then you're bound to get burned

Disney's picture

Haha

Well we'll all agree to disagree! I liked the remake of Pride and Prejudice, I thought Keira Knightley did a good job and I really liked the way the romance was portrayed from start to finish, plus the costumes and locations were fitting, although I do see the qualm with the money invested. Nonetheless, traditionally movies = entertainment, and the remake fit that for me! Hmm, imagine a Wuthering Heights update. Eek.

I guess I didn't pick up on the Cabin Fever cell thing, that sounds very artistically clever! I wasn't sure who Rider Strong was out of the cast Jeff, then I looked him up, aaaaaah Boy Meets World! I used to watch that series regularly growing up too!

I've had this song stuck in my head, and since movies can be videos and it's a music video, I think you all should take a gander and express opinions!

I think the dance number at the end isn't THAT impressive, but overall I think it's reeeeeeally innovative and sounds very unique!

You're Amazing.

Adam A's picture

meow

i am yet to comment on this forum