Being wanted is a funny thing, something I've considered recently in moments of self pity.
Most of us all have a yearning to be wanted by someone else. It's the basis I suppose of relationships with boyfriends/girlfriends. Being wanted by another, above all others. You are his, He is yours. Beyond that we have "best" friends, or family members we're really close to.
I'm second best to everyone I know. Kirstie has Dean. Terry has Sam. Holly has Natalie. Gemma has Luke and the kids. Dad has Jacqui, and, well, I certainly wouldn't qualify as his favourite even if she weren't around! I am nobody's "one" person, I am nobody's "top" friend, though I make it on to quite a few "top 8" lists! Not so much as a pet dog.
I had Alex, who then on Monday decided the long distance thing wasn't working, and that he felt "restricted" because he hasn't had the chance yet to go out and "experiment". Breaking up with a layer of BS on top is so tiresome, particularly when no matter how clued you are on the cliches, their protestations that it's the truth comforts you. But deep down you know.
And so I go back to sitting here, second best, Bridget Jones style, holding a glass of wine and listening to Amy Winehouse. Even she has Blake. Pathetic.