Second Best

Campfire's picture

Being wanted is a funny thing, something I've considered recently in moments of self pity.

Most of us all have a yearning to be wanted by someone else. It's the basis I suppose of relationships with boyfriends/girlfriends. Being wanted by another, above all others. You are his, He is yours. Beyond that we have "best" friends, or family members we're really close to.

I'm second best to everyone I know. Kirstie has Dean. Terry has Sam. Holly has Natalie. Gemma has Luke and the kids. Dad has Jacqui, and, well, I certainly wouldn't qualify as his favourite even if she weren't around! I am nobody's "one" person, I am nobody's "top" friend, though I make it on to quite a few "top 8" lists! Not so much as a pet dog.

I had Alex, who then on Monday decided the long distance thing wasn't working, and that he felt "restricted" because he hasn't had the chance yet to go out and "experiment". Breaking up with a layer of BS on top is so tiresome, particularly when no matter how clued you are on the cliches, their protestations that it's the truth comforts you. But deep down you know.

And so I go back to sitting here, second best, Bridget Jones style, holding a glass of wine and listening to Amy Winehouse. Even she has Blake. Pathetic.

Comments

Lol-taire's picture

Aww love, I'm sorry. Thing

Aww love, I'm sorry.

Thing is though, you know people don't actually have numbered lists of their top favourite or most important people. We just have sort of webs of the people we love. I couldn't rank my friends or siblings or parents. I'm pretty sure my dad has a favourite child (not me), but he's the exception.

You are in people's lives. But no-one tells each other this. I don't know, maybe you're a demonstrative person, but I have loads of people I'd actually never tell I loved or needed. Although I do love and need them. There must be people feel the same way about you and wouldn't even think to mention it. It's just not what people do.

Anyway until one person is the centre of your life (or close enough), then would you want to be at the centre of anyone else's? It's not always a comfortable place to be.

jeff's picture

Well...

Depends how you look at it. I'm many people's #2 friend on MySpace, etc., and it's a solid position. The #1 person changes, as does the #3, depending on who they're dating and other social forces, whereas #2 is pretty much solid.

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"Be like a postage stamp. Stick to one thing until you get there." -- Josh Billings.

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