Its been 16 days since it all happened.
And it still hurts.
School is a living torture.
Seeing her is mentally upsetting.
How do make a person realise that u miss em so much,that u cry to urself in the night?
Does she know?
Can she notice the vacancy in my eyes?
Have i always looked so pale?
Its like,i just need a reason to start crying.ANYTHING about her,her gifted pen, her borrowed jumper, our pictures together , sets tears in my eyes.
Why cant i just be IMMUNE?!
Im sure she is.Im sure she doesnt care.she seems so happy.
I mean,why should she care?she has her huge cock boyfriend. why would she even NEED me?
Why do i still WANT her?i dunt NEED her. i really dont.
i mean,i have other chicks around me who can help me get over S.BUT i dunt wana use these pretty young ladies!its wrong,wrong,WRONG!i would never do that.no matter in how much depression i sink into.because something tells me,its not gona work anyway.
which reminds me,my other friend D(who i hooked up looooonnggg tym bk),is hitting on me again.
recently,we were talking about some ramdom things on da fone,and suddenly she's like "i can satisfy u emotionally...(pause)...and physically too"
i freaked! im in such a state that i mentally FORGOT how to flirt back with an absolutely delicious chick. i remember changing the topic at that point.
im SUCH a loser.