Arrgh I am back to college tomorrow,after having two weeks off.I should probably be in bed by now.I am quite tired.I had about three hours sleep last night before I had to get up for work this morning,as I went out with my friends and didn't make it home until the small hours.
It was sort of a random,unexpected night out.I hadn't planned on going,but my friend really wanted to and succeeded in talking me around to go out with her.She is a friend I work with and whom I am closeted to.As we hadn't planned on going out after work,I didn't have enough time to go to my house and then get ready.So we decided it would be quicker to get changed in hers.Which would be where things sort of got awkward...well not exactly awkward..it would probably be better to say potentially awkward when I do come-out.
Basically the girl has no problem getting changed in front of me and vice-versa,and there is no reason she should have a problem.It is not like I would be perving on her anything,and I find nothing arousing about the whole situation(does that make me a bad lesbian?)but I am scared she is going to be really uncomfortable about it when I do eventually get around to telling her.
She is not homophobic really,but I do know lesbians/gayness makes her a little bit uncomfortable.She went to a gay bar a few weeks ago because a friend of a friend was going with her group of friends.She was telling me about it afterwards and she did say she was a little bit uncomfortable.Mainly because the girls there were kind of joking with her and her friends because they could see it was making them uncomfortable.
It was not the first time we have gotten changed togethr.Usually when there is a staff night out we will go and do the whole girly getting ready to go out thing in one of our houses,and everytime we do I worry about what she will say or think once she knows.I know I should probably stop sitting contemplating my life and sort it out.But somehow I can't seem to help doing it.