electricity's picture

S pissed me off today.

We were joking around at McDonald's about what my name could be if we lengthened it to an even fuller name [this was a group of 5 about, btw] and they came up with a boy's name. It was all in good humor, and S says "it's like you're parents already knew..." in which I replied, jokingly "just because I like girls doesn't mean I want to be a guy" and she responds with a sarcastic "Oh, ok!" as if that's not the case! As if, no, I am supposed to be a guy.

That's probably not what she meant, because that would be incredibly stupid and ignorant, but just the fact that she uses such a condescending tone to keep herself from looking bad pisses me off! There's hardly a response to that!

She's one of those people that wants to be wittier/funnier/BETTER than you. And so she'll be really condescending about shit and generally end up being an asshole to make you look and feel like an idiot. That's why I've been breaking contact with her lately.

And God knows being voted most likely to succeed for Senior Best boosted her ego to the moon and back.

People like that frustrate me. When they try to bring attention to themselves by being smarter than everyone, you know? Anyway, rant over.

I'm ending things with C soon. I don't know, it's hard to know when. I love her to death, but I just feel like her best friend more than anything. I mean, there's more than that behind it, like her insecurities with her sexuality and my wanting to experience mine, but the main thing is I just don't feel as involved with her as I used to.

I talked to my therapist about my issues with talking about homosexuality and all things related with my friends too much. Confirmed: it'd be annoying if it was any topic brought up too much. I'm just trying to bring it into my life so much that I'm reaching for any opportunity.

Ugh, I can't wait to just fucking clear the air of everything I've been holding lately. FUCK.