alive, but not living.

Ricky-chan72's picture

So I'm back in the States (eww!) after spending 10 days on a tropical island. Puerto Rico's a great place. It's a place of tremendous beauty and rich in culture, and well I'm proud to say I'm Puerto Rican. But enough of that, on to the ramblings.

Everything feels so stagnant now. Even during the last few days in Puerto Rico, everything felt so dry, so dead. It's weird, I know I'm alive, I have a pulse, I'm breathing, I'm just not living. Nothing's happening.

I need to go out way more than I do now. I'm stuck in this house, doing nothing but playing games, watching TV, or writing scripts for videos. I need to get out of here, out of this stupid place where I have to act a certain way as to not arouse suspicion. I need someone to rouse my spirit out of this nothingness. I need some spontaneity. And God it would be great if I could get it all now.

But whatever, I'm not even sure of what I really want anymore.

I'm going to go block out my emo-ness by blasting loud heavy metal and headbanging, kthnx.


Neutrina's picture

I know the feeling... heavy

I know the feeling...
heavy metal = awesome. Have you tried hanging with hyper friend-people? Or a totally random project? Those tend to help me.

"She's a mystery
She's too much for me
But I keep coming back for more
She's just the girl I'm looking for"
-The Click Five "Just the Girl"