what happens when people say stuff to you

haleyxlynn's picture

Soooo today me and my mom pulled into my great good all american drive through and there were like 3 kids and their parents just sittin there. So while my mom went in and got what ever she was gettin i noticed the kids were whispering and looking at me and such so then one goes are you a girl or boy ( im a girl btw but i have short hair) so i ignor them and they keep making fun and poking jokes at me even their parents join in by the time my mom got out i was almost in tears but still holding up ...... I was just wondering if any of you guys have any stories like that or and like teasing if so how do you deal (i usually just ignor them and try not to cry as to leep my dignity)

jeff's picture

Never happened to me...

... but it doesn't sound like ignoring them is working for you. Ignoring only works if you actually don't let what they say bother you, which doesn't seem to be the case.

A lot of people back down if you respond back, but others get even worse, so hard to say.

For responses, can stick with the classic: "I'm more of a man than you'll ever be and more of a woman than you'll ever get."

---

"Sell your cleverness and buy bewilderment." - Rumi

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haleyxlynn's picture

If nothing else i'd love to

If nothing else i'd love to see the persons face when i say that.but thanks for the advice i think it is time that i stop ignoring them and start standing up for myself a little more.

loreonpravus's picture

I got kicked out of the

I got kicked out of the girl's bathroom once...they didn't believe I was female. I got back in after but the person who was all rude and arrogant and completely blind was gone.

That being said, that sort of "are you a guy or a girl?" thing happens to me on a regular basis...I just ignore, actually, but if I'm feeling cocky or in a sour mood, I'll say something that usually has me kicking myself later.

fox333's picture

have you ever read stone

have you ever read stone butch blues?
'Oh Brave New World!'
- Brave New World
I think...

haleyxlynn's picture

No i dont think i have read

No i dont think i have read that book but i shall look into it

electricity's picture

I know I get a lot of

I know I get a lot of confused looks all the time, and I'm commonly mistaken for a boy, but no one's ever mean about it. I'm sorry that happened to you. How fucked of the parent's too. Bitches.

I would confront them. "Do you have something you'd like to say? Is there a problem?" etc. And I like Jeff's comeback, hah.

Azul's picture

Vermont's a pretty liberal

Vermont's a pretty liberal place. I certainly don't qualify as looking queer either, so people don't go "Haha! Look at the queers!"

In fact, a girl even tried to get after me (I'm a dude). Until my brother told her that I liked boys. People still have to confirm that I'm a homo.

People haven't done things quite like they've done to you, but I've experienced some blatant homophobia. Like that one girl who thought that the queers shouldn't be able to adopt children because they'll touch the children. She felt that way only about the male queers though, female queers could totally have adopted children.

dreamers imagine someday's picture

I often work with

I often work with youthgroups and day cares, and a lot of these are sponsered by the Catholic church. So a lot of the times parents will make complaints about me not being appropiate for young children because when they asked if I am a boy or a girl, I say "a bit of both". And I know people make jokes, but I think the best thing you can do is to be there and stand proud of who you are. But i love the fact that those in charge of the institutions are telling the parents that complain, that there is nothing wrong with me because I am being honest to the children about the fact that there are different people out there and that you need to love and respect them all equally and if they have an issue with that well then good luck finding a new day care and youth camp in the middle of summer. But then again the fact that I live in San Francisco may make the difference.

But the best way to face teasing, is to be proud of who you are and knowing that no one can change that fact and that well you can teach them what they are doing is wrong, and while they may ignore it, just know you made an effort.

When I call out Your Name Do you Hear's picture

I've had that happen

I've had that happen multiple times. I've had teachers at my school mistake me for a guy......I dress so much like one....with baggy shirts...it's often hard to see my boobs......I often at work since I clean the womens lockers rooms...wonder if people think I'm a guy from behind.....I get self-aware....

"And you wonder why baby's so hairy....cause he's a werebaby!"

my three wheeler rox's picture

...

First day of school my senior year I had to get the security guards to tell my teacher that I was who I said I was. He didn't believe I am a girl even though I showed him my school ID and driver's license. He was really embarassed..
I gave him as much crap as he gave me though.. And he ended up kicking me out of his class permanantly.
Next time somone does that crap to you... If someone calls you "sir" or "young man" and it offends you, do the same to them. If it's a woman call her "sir" or if it's a dude, call him "ma'am"

What do you tell a quad rider with two black eyes?
Nothin! You alredy told 'im twice!

1stTeeka's picture

well lol

i would have probubly been like "well you look like an idiot but i dont go asking you that now do I?" i dont get confused for a woman but you can do stuff like that for nomatter what people use to try and insult you. if they dont like it be like "dont insult me and i wont make you look like a fool"

**Far from a saint, not quite a sinner**