agh.

Anonymous's picture

L and i were talking in french class yesterday.
she was playing with my hair, and tony walks past.
i yell, "Bonjour, Anton!" to him, and then L adds,
"don't you mean Antonietta?" jokingly.
"hey, that's my middle name," i add, randomly.
"there's a ...." - she mumbles something -"girl named Antonietta that goes here. You know who she is, right? Toni Something." she starts to twirl hair on the back of my head.
"i don't know her, but i know the name" i answer.
"She's..." she mumbles again.
"Huh?"
"People say she's gay. I don't know personally if she is, but..." she gets a smile on her face.
"No."
"She's way better...prettier than J." she adds. (i find that hard to belive. i rarely find people prettier than J)
"Don't you even dare try and fix me up with her." I turn around and look her straight in the eyes, and then look back towards J, who's paying no attention. I sigh and get back to the assignment.

i'm not sure what to make of this, because, knowing L, she might try and get us to be at least friends, and she might not. I don't even know if "Toni" is even really gay, or just rumored to be because she's outspoken or something like that. All through computers i thought about it... but, i don't even know what she's like. and i am sure as HELL not over J.

- i just found toni on myspace, and OH MY FCKING GOD she is GORGEOUS! *sighs* she's too pretty. the girl next door type. possibly a softball player... or was it volleyball? whatever. she's a sophmore, i'm pretty sure. she could be a model. i know i have a 0% chance, and i don't really care. but wow... she is PRETTY. what if she joins the GSA or talks to me? - i'll blank. i get nervous around new people, especially beautiful ones.

ugh. and i saw Friend(can't say her name. my mom will probably read this and recognise it, and not allow me to speak to her ever again. [yeah, my parents read this. i don't want them to, but they do. they monitor everything i do online. i fkn hate that]) today and walked to class with her (without her noticing. she doesn't recognise me :P - new hair) and had random butterflies the whole way there. i'm not sure what to think of that. i've noticed how amazingly pretty she is before, too, but never really thought too much about it. and i CANNOT fall for her.