So, this is a poem that I wrote a few months ago...but I havent been on oasis in forever, so I'm only just posting it. I'd love to know what y'all think...and if there's anyone else who gets what I'm talking about.
(Read Between the Lines)
the sex of a thing is defined
by it's physical genitalia: male or female
gender is an individual's
self conception of being male or female
i want to know
why can't i be both?
i'm not a boy, i think i'd know, and somehow 'girl' doesn't fit
so how do i find my balance against this bipolar world?
left or right or good or bad or black or white;
but what happened to purple?
there's no different, no in between
i'm living here between the lines
and it's so tight in here i can hardly breathe
there's no place for me in a world so dual it forgot the word 'three'
no place for a woman who's a man who's male and female and something else
and I need another word!
there's no acceptance, just defiance
no tolerance, just ignorace
it's left or right or wrong
where do i find the place to be the space between the lines?
and how do i find the time to be a box of crayons
in a world insisting i be a ball point pen?
these words describe, define, classify, identify
they box me in, but i'm ready to unpack all the confusion and let someone else figure it out
i'm not a boy
but i'm not really a girl, either
i know there's something in between
like the pauses between notes,
and the space between the lines
i know it's got to have some deeper meaning in the grander scheme of things
but i can't find any words to
describe, define, classify, identify myself
but sometimes silence is better than sound
sometimes a journal is a better friend than a book
and that's where i can bloom, in the space between the lines
where no one's written anything before
that's where i can grow and change and become something that no one's seen before
that's not man or woman or boy or girl
or boi or hir or ze
and if i make up a word for whatever it is i am,
then i hope, someday, when it's been printed in some dictionary for a hundred years or so
that someone else will come along and scoff
and pencil something in
between the lines