Hmmm- first post- coming out

jos's picture

So i just signed-up here, wish there was an about section, but anyway...

Mi name is José or Joseph or Giuseppe or just Jos, i live in mexico city, am 18 years old, studyin biology (love it!)
I had a blog once, well twice, but i felt, twice, that it was just too public, and i guess this can also get too public...

I kind of tend to spill everything out as soon as possible, always had, but about 4 months ago i moved here and started living alone and since i've felt that i'm kind of more private, guess my mind goes "totally new world, you're alone, red alert, defense shell ON!". So i tell nothing, well almost nothing. But the impulse of spilling everything out is still there hence anonymous posting, yay!

So, obviously, i'm gay, i realized i was a long time ago, sixth grade, and before that i was kind of asexual, i don't know if asexual is the right word but i just didn't fancy anyone, boy nor girl.
But then, one day at my aunt's house i was watching mtv with my cousin, we were like 10 or 11, and the rock dj video came on and i felt weird things down there.
Not so much time after that, i had my first orgasm, by myself and freaked me out enormously, and i thought about a boy in my class and everything just fall into place, "i'm gay" the epiphany.

It was really easy for me, it just felt it was the right thing so i embraced it. I think it was because i have super cool parents who always said to me that everything was ok unless it harmed others.
And, of course, it felt great thinking about naked boys.

Coming out wasn't that easy.

As a kid the other kids, male young terrorists, always said things like "faggot" and such. Which really got to me at the time, i was really sensitive about what everyone said or thought about me.
Fortunately i learned and now that doesn't matter almost at all, but it took me a lot to get here.

Anyway, i first told a girl-friend, she just loved it, she said she had always wanted a gay friend, we were 11.
Having such a good start i began to tell my close friends but among them i told the wrong person and suddenly the hole school knew.

Don't really remember how i handle that but we moved at the end of that school year so i guess it wasn't much of a problem.
And it really helped me, i started to identify the people who would accept it and the ones who wouldn't.
Then we moved back again and i entered a different school and i told my cousin, which was great because we're like brother and sister and more.

And then i entered high school and for the first time i met another gay person. And that was really helpful, because together we started living a totally out life, we just didn't care if people knew or not, we just did and said whatever we wanted, and still do. Plus we're now best friends (in the true meaning of the words) and she's the person i love most.

And one day, think it was still high school's first year, i saw brokeback mountain's trailer,never had any contact with gay culture before that, and i thought "gay cowboys, we're everywhere!".
So that night i wrote my parents a coming-out letter and waited for them to arrive and read it and then i went to their room and they just said "we already knew". And it was just great.

I always knew they were both going to be totally ok with it but i still felt scared, guess it was because i knew so many coming-out stories gone wrong.
And now, like always, they support me in being gay and everything else, they have met 3 of my boyfriends and even tried to gave me gay sex education but realized i already knew, which i think relieved them because they looked really uncomfortable.
They rock.

I know i'm really lucky and my coming out story is kind of uncommon, and wish is was just as easy for everyone, but i think we're getting there.
I really think we are.

Hmm wanted to write a mini bio and ended up writing my coming out story...
Guess the coming out story is always a mini bio...


fox333's picture

hi welcome to oasis! its

hi welcome to oasis!
its great you can tell who you can trust. my ability to read people or even know what their going to do next is zero. so yeah.... hugs and rainbows!

"I feel like Nacy Drew in the mystery of the midlife crisis."
-Roger Bannister
The Stepford Wives

jos's picture



and hugs and rainbows to you too

wrote hungs instead of hugs......

jeff's picture

Welcome to the site..

Good timing, I just posted my Diego Luna story on the site tonight, heh.

Mexico City is cool. I went to Cabaretito, I think it was... not sure if you're old enough to go there or not.

Glad you found the site. This site's pretty basic, not much needs to be said in an about page, I don't think.

"Sell your cleverness and buy bewilderment." - Rumi

Add me on Facebook and MySpace.

jos's picture


i just read the diego luna's interview :P

i'm old enough to go to cabaretito but i live far and transportation issues and money and yeah...

but i'm visiting the city were i used to live and definitely going to gay bars there

ShowMeLove's picture

Hey! Welcome

Wow! That's great that your parents took it so well. You are deffinatly one of the lucky ones:D I'm not out yet, but I *think* it will go pretty well when I do finally do it. Anyways, it's always nice to meet someone new. Have fun while you are here:)

I Live to Love,
I Love to Live.

jos's picture


thanks :D

i hope it goes great for you but make sure you do it when YOU are ready

before i came out i felt there was some kind of rush about it, a "do it NOW!" mood or something
but there's really no rush at all
nobody needs you to come out, so just take your time

wow, 3 comment in less than an hour,

ShowMeLove's picture

Thanks:) I'll definitely be


I'll definitely be coming out when I feel it's right. Sometimes though, I do feel like just blurting it out just to have it all out in the open. That could be a bad idea depending on who I'm around at the time.

Tomboy for life

5thstory's picture

Hola José, bienvenido. Nice

Hola José, bienvenido.
Nice story, it's quite good that your parents took the whole gay thing so positively (a mi como que me dejarían de hablar por un rato...)
Igual, bienvenido a Oasis.

" . . . The sun does not shine upon this fair earth to meet frowning eyes, depend upon it." Charles Dickens

jos's picture


Ush, that'd suck

and thanks

and where are you from?

Riku's picture

Biology is awesome isn't

Biology is awesome isn't it?

I felt afraid to come out to my parents at first too, even though I knew they'd be okay with it. My dad is the most amazing about it, he supports me fully. It's great.

There was some other stuff I wanted to say.. But I forgot it...

Anyways, Welcome to Oasis! :) I hope you like it here.

jos's picture

It is, it is!!!!

Yeap, biology is GREAT!!!

hope you remember...


if not now, then when?

jos's picture



WantsOut's picture

Hi. I can't stand not being

Hi. I can't stand not being a part of things *Laughs maniacally*

Written lovingly for you, yes, ONLY you,