Im so sick of this bullshit

ShowMeLove's picture

Getting really sick of everything at home now. At like 6pm today some woman that lives next door came over and complained about our dogs barking to much....So, that started a lovely fight between my parents. Fucking woman why doesn't she go and piss on someone else's life. It's not like my parents are lacking in things to fight about these days...or ever. So, once my dad goes to bed things are fine and me and my mom watch some TV(Nights are SO much better cause there's no fighting or hyperness/overreacting) then he comes downstairs at 10pm(Usual time that my mom goes to bed and I go to my room and on my computer) And the minute he starts bullshit. It's all about how he can't sleep because of life...Blah, blah...Then he gets on about how she(my mom) drives him crazy she doesn't understand and this other crap...Blah fucking blah. I go upstairs to my room when he starts to quiet down and calm down.

THEN, I go back downstairs after my mom has gone to their room to get my books that I left down there and he starts on me about what am I gonna do after I'm done this class...I say "I don't know, I'll probably take the other one that's sorta like it" Then he starts saying all this crap "Don't you want to go to university?" No dad I'm too fucking stupid! Don't you get it I hate school, I'm insecure, and at this very moment I hate my fucking life. I'm so sick of all the bullshit and on top of everything I'm suppressing everything and I have no one to talk to about it. I can't be honest with anyone. And I have no friends.

I didn't say any of those things out loud just in my head. Instead I said I don't know....Then he's talking loudly telling me I should go to college/university. That if I don't I'll miss out on a great experience. He knows what he's talking about. That I'm stupid if I don't take this opportunity. And he's trying to help but his methods are wrong....I'm crying cause whatever fucking reason.....So, I had to stay down there until I could control my crying and wipe my face so he wouldn't know that I was...cause he'd think I was crying just because of our talk but there's obviously so much more going on with me that he doesn't know about. And I don't want to talk to him about it. I'm sick of this.

Comments

bulldyke's picture

*hug* let me know if you

*hug* let me know if you ever want to talk.

i know i say my parents are great, and they are...now. they used to fight like that...over every little thing, until you just want to scream at them, and cry, and just curl up in a ball. so...if you ever want to talk. i'm here.

(i'm horrible bout logging into yahoo, but if you send me a message somewhere, i'll get on)

*hug*

Bulldyke
"I think some mistakes are meant to be made, because we can't help but hope that they won't be mistakes."

ShowMeLove's picture

Thanks, it honestly means a

Thanks, it honestly means a lot:)

Just writing it all out on here like this helps so much.

Go hence, to have more talk of these sad things. Some shall be pardoned, some punished. Never was a story of more regret than this of Juliet and her fair Juliet.

bulldyke's picture

yeah, i so wish i'd had this

yeah, i so wish i'd had this when my parents were fighting all the time. but writing is awesome.

i forget, can you txt from your phone? cause if you can, and if you're cool with it, you can have my number, and we can chat anytime...only if you want. :P

*hug*

Bulldyke
"I think some mistakes are meant to be made, because we can't help but hope that they won't be mistakes."

ShowMeLove's picture

Thanks for the hugz

Yeah, I can text from my cell. If you wanna exchange numbers that would be cool with me:) It might really help some day.

Go hence, to have more talk of these sad things. Some shall be pardoned, some punished. Never was a story of more regret than this of Juliet and her fair Juliet.

WantsOut's picture

All I can say: Life's a

All I can say: Life's a bitch

Goodnight. I'm going to bed. I'm gonna talk to everyone tommorow, after BullDyke PMs me again, im going to bed. I still want it to end

ShowMeLove's picture

All I can say: Life's a bitch

You can say that again...

Go hence, to have more talk of these sad things. Some shall be pardoned, some punished. Never was a story of more regret than this of Juliet and her fair Juliet.