Ramblings; of the most common and annoying variety

clarice123's picture

Not being friends with her is hard.
Not taking care of her is harder.
The hardest part, however, is convincing myself that this is for the best.

How can I feel this so completely, to the point where I can feel my heart wrenching every time I'm around her, and have her feel nothing in return?

Why is she so depressed now?
Why did she stare at my body like a piece of meat New Year's Eve?
Why can't I believe her when she says we were only ever friends?
Why can't I accept that I was wrong.

When we talked about it, she said that my gender wasn't an issue.
(!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
Only that she didn't feel that way, about me.
But if I were a boy (thanks Beyonce), nothing like what happened would have happened. Make sense?

I just need something to kill all my hope. Immediately.
Amazing it's still hanging around.

Comments

Lehcure's picture

ah. that sounds confusing

ah. that sounds confusing O.o
no, the if you were a boy part (ha, beyonce, yeah) does not make sense at allllll, soo, what, is she thinking that things happening with boys aren't just as meaningful as things happening with girls?..that upsets me, i know some people like that. :\