Finding my orientation

Bi the Book's picture

I need help guys. I'm not sure if I am lesbian or bisexual or even gay at all! Any advice to help me figure it out? I'm pretty sure I'm bisexual but I'm not completley positive. HELP!!!!!


Zephyr's picture

Whoa, I have been there

And believe me, it's not an easy process, but my advice to you is not worry about it. And just decide that you're going to be attracted to who you're going to be attracted to. Even if sometimes you don't understand it. Labels aren't all that necessary. It can be comforting, but ultimately, it's just putting yourself into a box. So, I would say to just sit, and not worry about it. You're young. Who cares?

And I like your name, it's very clever. xDD

Did you meet your fortune teller?
Do it up, it's always stellar

Bi the Book's picture


Thanks for the advice. I'm leaning more to the bisexual side but I'm still not totally sure. And thanks. I like my name too. ;-)

Areyoulistening's picture

I've been there too..

Very recently actually.
Don't stress about it, and don't worry about what other people think.
I think that was my main problem, I'm scared of being judged, and of losing my friends.
Kay, I dont really know what I am talking about here, but maybe think about the reasons you think you are les/bi?
Why do you think you might be, are you attracted to girls?
Hope that helps..


'When I was calling for the answer that you probably shouldn’t know.
When it feels like flames surrounding me here.'

Bi the Book's picture

I am scared...

...of being judged.

I care what people think of me and I know that I shouldn't. Horrible habit. I wish I didn't so much. I think I am les/bi because yes I am attracted to girls, and guys. The attraction is stronger towards girls but I still do like guys. Thanks. Your advice did help some.

jeff's picture

The best way...

If you see an available girl that interests you, date her, see where it goes.

If you see an available guy that interests you, date him, see where it goes.

Keep doing the above until 10 years pass.

After 10 years, look back, and you'll have your answer.

"People who are happy are slugs... They do not move the human race forward."
-- Camille Paglia, on Oasis

Bi the Book's picture


That is good advice. I think I might do that but in a shorter period of time like 2 or 3 years. I am leaning more towards bisexual, but again, I'm still not sure. Thanks for the help

jacjessen90's picture


X years!!! oy gavald!! (sorry, jewish moment!!)

rainforestchild's picture

I have been there

I have been there completely...and still sort of am. Jeff is right you just have to have different relationships and see what works. Don't worry about labeling yourself yet. :)

Bi the Book's picture

The problem is...

...that I do live my life with labels.

Not everyone in my life has a label, but some of them do. Don't get me wrong. I will definitely try to erase some of those labels. Thanks for the words of advice.

jacjessen90's picture

more advice

this is the state that was, is, and is to be, but as they say, DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT!!!! and if you find your self doing so, listen to Alfred E Newman,(what?, me worry?) and you'll at least have a good laugh!!!