Fucking around with people's emotions.

scandalboy's picture

So I'm bored. It's a Sunday afternoon, not much to do except smoke and I don't have any. I left a boy hanging before...we were talking on msn, and he was like, "It might make me feel better if I fuck your arse."
Me: It might.....but I'll have to check my schedule.
After a bit more, I logged out. To make him squirm. He texted me before saying, "U left." So I logged in again and told him my msn cut out. I don't know why I did it... he wants to fuck me, I think it's a power trip. I truly have him under my thumb, and I enjoy it. I'll fuck him in the end, I think.

I shouldn't do that though, should I? Messing around with people like that? See at first he was the one doing it to me... then I got screwed over a few seperate times by other boys and I've toughened up a bit. And I'd rather hurt him than him hurt me. I think it makes me a cunt, lying to him like that, but I think I'd rather get in first than last.

I'm listening to my Little Shop of Horrors soundtrack, and I'm convinced that Suddenly Seymour is the BEST love song. Ever. Full stop.
It's weird listening to it...I'm pretty happy because it brings back a lot of memories, but it's sad basically for the same reason - it was possibly the best thing I ever did in high school, nothing will ever top it. (Okay I lie, it's like in the top 3.)

Every time I think I'm on steady ground, something happens to convince me otherwise. Like, I finally realised that I'm more interested in a long term relationship and that fucking around has never made me feel better. But then this guy comes along. At first I wanted to date him, then I changed my mind. He wants to fuck me, then asked me on a date. Never did anything about it... I turned cold after some other bad experiences.... am seriously considering just fucking him but I enjoy playing around with him as well. What to do, what to do.

Comments

SunshineBright's picture

Don't be an asshole. Just

Don't be an asshole. Just leave him to get hurt by someone else. Never stoop to his level. Especially since you've been the victim of such crimes.

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"But for all of those who don't fit in, Who follow their instincts and are told they sin, This is a prayer for a different way." - Pet Shop Boys

WantsOut's picture

Be an asshole. The entire

Be an asshole. The entire world is here for YOUR pleasure. Seriously, if you want to do that, go on ahead. Stoop to his level. Have some fun and get back at the world.

jeff's picture

Hmm...

Should you hurt him, or let him hurt you? Serious dilemma here. Oh wait, why don't you just stop talking to him, if you both aren't interested in more than sex. You're cute. You can get no strings sex without all the games easy enough.

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"Sell your cleverness and buy bewilderment." - Rumi

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ferrets's picture

i agree

i agree with sunshine just because people are there dosnt mean your can just string them back and forth. you dont like your emoitioms
stomped on dont stomp on others.

(slightly reluctant)hugs from ferrets