guilt..........

ferrets's picture

today i was skiing with my friends up on crystal mountain(we wernt playing hookey, the day was off for teacher confrence). so we were up there, and we got to a peticularley steep slope, and i tripped and tumbbled, if you have ever done snow sports, you know this isnt fun. this hill wass about 500 feet long before it leveled out, so about 350 feet to go, i trip and tumble down this hill, which is filled with mogels( big bumps in the snow that are not pleasent to fall down). i lost both my poles and skis, and stoped sliding about 100 feet befor it levels out. i didnt break anything, but im bruised and sore, so i decide to head to the lodge. one of my freinds gos with me. so we get to the bottom and we take our skiis off(i had to hike back up the hill to get my skis and poles). and she takes her gloves off, so i ask her to take off my helmet, because im to lazy to take off my gloves and do it myself. so she does, but after she takes it off, she runs her hand down my cheek, onto my neck, and leans forwaard and kisses me. i explode with emoitions. you may think this is a stupid reason to be guilty, because she kissed me, but im guilty, because i kissed back, i didnt enjoy the kiss to much, i supose she was a good kisser, but it was a.......... girl(sorry just not the funnest thing when your a fag, you lesbians can have the girls)i kissed back, well im not sure ehy i kissed back. she pulls back and smiles and says' do you want somemore?' and i say 'no' and told her i had someone. i didnt specifie whether it was a boy or girl, so i told the truth. but i feel guilty because i...kissed....back. iis it stupid i feel guilty?

ferrets with flame throwers

Comments

Lehcure's picture

ouch. I hope your bruises

ouch. I hope your bruises get better! I can understand why you'd feel guilty for doing that, but there's no need to. she took a chance. Chances can go in different directions, and you were not expecting it. you didn't have time to think. I'm sure you would have politely rejected if she would have asked you, but I know things don't work like that. it'll be okay. no need to worry about a kiss too much, *hug*

ferrets's picture

why...........

is my life so fucking confusing since i became gay? not that it dosnt make me happy, just being stuck between girls wanting me, and not wanting to come out yet.............

ferrets

Peregrine's picture

i know how you feel. it

i know how you feel. it sucks now that the girls know i ish gay they wont leave me alone, but none of the guys want me... it feels weird.

Listen to the music around you, and live life. Never show fear, and you can do anything!

Riku's picture

Ouch

That sucks.

I hope the guilty feeling goes away soon, I mean, it's not your fault, you were just reacting. But I get why you feel that way.

Also, coming out as gay does not cause girls to back off. So don't get your hopes up.