I got home rather late last night...much later than I had intended. By the time I could shoo away my three friends, who were understandably a bit reluctant to leave, I was totally wiped out, and I wanted to wait until my head was more clear before I talked to you guys. Thank you all so much for the outpouring of concern. I did "ghost" in and read all of your posts. Made me blubber a bit, I must confess, but it was nice to have so much love and support welcoming me home. I apologize to you all for putting you through this, and I hope that you will forgive me. Just remember, it's also okay to be angry at me about this. It was a stupid and selfish thing to do, and something I try really hard to prevent any of you from trying. So if any of you have thought about suicide lately, or think about it in the future, just look back on what just happened with me. I'll be talking more about this later, but I just wanted to touch on it briefly now.
Okay, what would a Pat post be without a lesson, right? So here it is:
If you think you are alone in the world, or that no one will care if you leave it, you're wrong... and if there isn't a good support system in your life, Oasis offers the means of building a pretty awesome one while you work on connecting/reconnecting with the people in your real/non-virtual life, or building new connections in the outside world. As you can see by my situation, everyone impacts far more people than they realize and to a far greater degree. So if you're one of those members that hasn't posted or engaged with anyone yet, why not give it a shot? People always use the excuse that it's too hard because everyone here already knows one another. Stop that nonsense at once! We are not like a club or a clique, where you have to be a certain way to fit in. The one thing that's required for you to be part of our family is that you step into the room - and by that I mean post a journal entry or a forum topic. If you post a "hi, I'm new" post, I promise you will get responses. We don't come looking for people who don't choose to post, because letting people move at their own pace is a big part of what we're all about here. If You're still ghosting (what I call reading as a guest), and have been thinking about joining....JOIN! That's all I have to say for now about that. The rest of you...seriously...there are so many ways to make life better. I just learned a bunch of new ones that I'll be passing on in the next few days and weeks. All you have to do is open yourself up to making the effort, and DON'T EVER FUCKING GIVE UP!!! As Adam would say...giving up is for pussies!!!
I didn't mean to go on so long...but you know me...so I'm going to go on a bit longer. :)
Just so you all know, everyone on Oasis does as much for me as I do for you...I would say more, but that's my perspective. I love each and every one of you...even those of you I've never talked to before...and I'm very, VERY happy to be back with you all again. Thanks again to everyone for supporting both me and my folks. They certainly appreciate it too, as I'm sure you've all gathered by now. I'm pretty sure my mom will continue to make appearances from time to time, as she has made numerous new friends here over the past few days. I actually think it would be good for many of you to get a bit of insight from her perspective. As someone on the other side of the whole "coming out" situation, maybe she can add a point of view that none of us other "old folks" on the site can.
Anyway...I'll be back to do more over the next few days. I'm not quite up to speed yet, but I'm working hard to get there. I've missed everyone very much.
Love and hugs to all,