Mixed feelings, mixed drinks.

Zephyr's picture

From reading the comments that Jeff and Adam left on my journal. I have more to think about. I know that being bi has nothing to do with having a threesome. I know that. I also know that being monogamous can be difficult for some people. For example, my gf. And I'm really proud of her for talking to me about it. Not that she's cheated on me, but that she feels like she needs something that I can't give her. Great that she's talking to me about it. But god it makes me feel like an asshole. Even though I know it shouldn't. She's only been with guys. I get it. And she is craving to be with a guy sexually. I get that too. But it's like, what more can I give her when I give her so much?

*sigh* I don't know what I'm supposed to do. I also haven't been able to spend time with her, like one on one personal time with her in a WEEK. Because she's been grounded. Which is starting to piss me off. Sorry, but I'm addicted to sex. Or. I crave it on a quite regular basis. It's been a week since I've seen her outside of school. It's been longer since we've had sex.

And I have to say that it's really starting to eat at me that she has been talking to this guy about having a threesome. I mean I don't find it that big of a deal if they are friends. Fine. Whatever. Friends are good. She needs more of them. I'm all for that. But friends are not people that you fuck. So. I don't see why that is a topic of conversation all the time. And she found out that he was a virgin. And... it was quite hilarious for me. She kind of flipped. And I totally wasn't surprised. I mean. It's not that big of a deal. But I don't really think that my gf and I should be ones that take his virginity. I just dont' want to go down that avenue. I don't think it wouldb e a good thing to do.

In other news unrelated to my gf. My best friend got drunk, got into a fight with her parents and then proceeded to prostitute herself for more alcohol. Like wtf? I know she has drinking issues, but why she feels the need to go to these extremes is beyond me. I just dont' really understand it. I am so pissed at her. She knows how I feel about her drinking. She knows that she has issues with alcohol, but she refuses to let her problems with alcohol get in the way of her drinking! which is why I'm so pissed at her. Like if you can say that out loud and not realize that there is a problem... then there is obviously something more to that. And I haven't said anything to her about it because I know that if I do, she and I are going to get into a really nasty fight. And I just don't want to deal with that. So I feel screwed either way. Because if I don't talk to her, then she feels like I don't care, and if I do talk to her then she feels like I'm being overbearing and trying to be her mother. Well. Bitch. At least I care more than your mother fucking mother does and have the balls to say shit to your face about how you are ruining your life. So there.