VDay Present from Above?

centerfielder08's picture

Met a beautiful girl today. and she's from Greece...which means she has an awesome accent. She and i have a mutual friend . I talked to her and my friend a little at school today but didnt get to introduce myself. She kept lookin over at me and smiling. I dont know if it was because she was meeting someone new or if she likes me.
Maybe the second assumption above is too ambitious?!?

Anyway....is there a way for me to tel if she's straight? Do I have my friends do invesitigative work?

Comments

kaseylalala's picture

you could have your friends

you could have your friends help.
or you could ask her lol which i probably
would never do because im shy but yah.
or write her a note.
theres many of ways.
have conversations with her =]
it will be easy to figure out once you get to know her.

jeff's picture

Hmm...

Sounds ambitious. I'd personally make it known that i was gay, which makes it easier on the other person. Or, since she's new, it's easy to ask if she had to leave a bf back home or something.

Of course, if you aren't gay, then that makes it harder.

---
"Sell your cleverness and buy bewilderment." - Rumi

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centerfielder08's picture

Well....I don't have classes

Well....I don't have classes with her, but just happened to see her when we went on a field trip today. I have some friends who have classes with her in the afternoons, I think. I told our mutual friend today and she told me that if she finds out the girl is gay, too, then she'll give me a heads up. Should I have a brave/courageous friend of mine find out?

Jeff...what do you mean it's harder if I'm not gay?...

jeff's picture

Well...

If you're a guy named Eli, and you like girls, than aren't you a heterosexual trans boy? Or did I jump a few steps there?

Butch gay chicks rarely go for the name change.
---
"Sell your cleverness and buy bewilderment." - Rumi

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Lol-taire's picture

Oh, so she's E-lie, I've

Oh, so she's E-lie, I've been reading it as Ellie...

Now that makes far more sense.

centerfielder08's picture

Heh...don't know if I'm

Heh...don't know if I'm trans. See, I haven't felt this way forever...truthfully. So, I mean, how could I be trans? Yes, I thought I could've been, but it seemed people were saying otherwise. But, yes. I want to be called Eli. And yes, I like to think of myself as a gentleman and a total dude.
So confused...where do I stand and how do I know?
--eli

jeff's picture

Well...

You take it a step at a time, and just keep moving away from the questions and toward the answers.

If you like girls, then you're either lesbian, bisexual, or possibly trans. So, we dumped straight off the list.

If you don't like guys at all, we can dump bi.

And you just keep moving toward what you like and feel, and away from what you don't.

Labels are best determined in hindsight, not advance.

---
"Sell your cleverness and buy bewilderment." - Rumi

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centerfielder08's picture

Hmm...okay, yeah...see, guys

Hmm...okay, yeah...see, guys are okay...I can see some as attractive but I would never want to be with a guy physically. And I know I want to spend the rest of my life with a woman. Straight and bi are crossed off my list.

Any other useful advice, Jeff?
--eli

jeff's picture

Well...

I'd say the Eli thing is going to confuse other gay women. So, either pick some unisex name if you don't like yours. Otherwise, I'd skip it for now.

But I'm notoriously rigid about labels. I say people shouldn't label themselves at all, but if you do, then they are specific: There is lesbian. There is trans.

I don't go for the 32 was to say bisexual (genderqueer, ad nauseum).

Ultimately, who cares? You like this girl, that's the important bit. Go after her. get to know her. Not if you bang her, but what is she like. Learn about her, she'll learn about you. And at some point, she'll indicate something that tips you off (that she's gay or straight), or you'll feel comfortable enough to tell her (that you're not straight. She only needs to know you like chicks, not all the trans possibilities at this point), and then you proceed. And if she's straight, she can be a good friend that eventually introduces you to the girl you end up with...

So, keep it about the journey, not the destination. Get to know her, and see where it goes, and admit how little you know about her, and the future, and just enjoy the moments for all they are.

---
"Sell your cleverness and buy bewilderment." - Rumi

Add me on Facebook.

jeff's picture

Damn...

My whole point of posting here originally was to ask if she had a thirst for knowledge and was studying sculpture, but I completely forgot. Not sure anyone on here would get that reference anyway... oh well.

---
"Sell your cleverness and buy bewilderment." - Rumi

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Lol-taire's picture

At St Martins College?

At St Martins College?

Lol-taire's picture

That's when I

That's when I

Lol-taire's picture

Caught her eye

Caught her eye

jeff's picture

No fair...

You're in the UK. How many people on here do you think are gunna know a song from 1994? :-)

---
"Sell your cleverness and buy bewilderment." - Rumi

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jeff's picture

Oh, in case anyone's wondering what we're going on about...

---
"Sell your cleverness and buy bewilderment." - Rumi

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centerfielder08's picture

I had no idea. She does love

I had no idea. She does love art, though...funny you should mention.
People at school don't call me Eli. I sign emails to most people (most friends who live near me) and then Oasis people with "Eli" because it makes me feel best. I purposely didn't want a gender-ambiguous name however. And yes, at the moment I am only coming out as lesbian because that is all I know so far. I'm not sure if I'm trans. Do you think I'll ever know the distinction in terms of myself?

Yeah. I really like her. I don't know her at all, but knowing another language is a huge turn-on for me, and she's from Greece. So, I want to get to know her first. Is it weird if I have friends of mine (who have classes with her) to find out about her preferences? I don't want to be a creep...?

--Eli.