what does britney spears mean when she says: "i'm like a performer the dancefloor is my stage"?
didn't tell you fuckers that ohad called last night, he was obviously in a party and sounded very bad, said he's very tired and wants to see me just as soon as he gets out of his friend's place. i told him..."ok". and that was that.
then he texts to say he'll ring when he's out of there...i replied...."ok".
and then later he rings again, alone this time, all quiet, still with that super tired tone, telling me he's just fucking dead and thinks he'll just go to sleep. i said..."ok" then i told him that if he wants us to stop seeing eachother he needs only say and that i'm ok with it....to which he replied that he wants to smack me, and then something about how he doesn't owe anything to anyone (the relevance of which i'm unsure of)....and then i said...."ok" and asked what he's doing tommorow (which is today)....he said something about friends again during the day but that he wants to see me at night, and thought i said...."ok"....it was perhaps about then that i relized what a total bootycall i am to him, he comes in the AM's, gets his cock and goes home...the end.
on a similar note, there was this guy, before ohad, that started fighting with me about how my pictures on the dating site were cheap because i showed my body...and yet he was talking to me very much like an interested party....so last night i reactivated my dating profile, and suprise suprise he checks me out and leaves tracks...so i send him a "hello" (fucker!) and we talk....now i get to thinking he's a conservative and all is normal with him and he's different bla bla bla, plus he seems like an intellegent kind. he sends me a picture of him, not suprisingly he's utterly fucking stunningly beautiful, so we move to messenger...and it wasn't long before i was sitting in front of the webcam naked, him asking me to show him more and more....which i didn't agree to. he got all into how much he doesn't like "full" men....so i realized...this guy's just another cunt on wheels, so in true spiteful bitch form, i gave him my number and led him to think we might meet today..but then didn't answer his call or text, and blocked him on the dating site...i'm soooooo over assholes. it was a bitchy thing to do...but he needs to learn his lesson, fucking hypocrit.
then, just so that i hit the trifecta....one of my ex-one night stands gets back in touch with me, telling me how much he enjoyed the sex last time and wants to meet up again, i told him, perhaps another night stud. fucking loser, this is the guy that wanted me to sniff some shit with him...ahh...no fucking waaay loser!
so....there you have it, one night, three assholes....tada!
now in about an hour, i might be head(yes please)ing out to a gallery opening where i can pretend to be cultured for the sake of drinking free wine while my grandma shoots me scornful glances...lol, ooh how i do embarass her. not the point, the point is that perhaps after that we might go see a movie, which will be only the third movie i've seen in a cinema since october 2007.
other than that what can i say....done my video...turned out fucking great, done my photography, turned out fucking great, and now i have to do that fucking collage...which i seriously coulnd't be fucked doing. blaaa.
i feel like seeing ruth, i miss her when we're not together. i think if i was straight i'd so go for a girl like ruth, she said i'm wasted on boys, so i guess that means she'd be into it too?? eh...i couldn't go there though, she's religious and i hate the whole institution (that doesn't mean i don't believe in God)....but meh....she's polish too by the way....why are all my friends polish?!
if i was a girl i would want to be beyonce, who wouldn't? the ass alone on that girl is enough.
but i wouldn't want her voice it's so....average. i would want macy gray's voice...or...i dunno...someone more powerful?
im still not over Ohad-been, it's annoying me coz usually once i decide to leave things alone i leave things well alone...but i think he's the first guy i genuinely, whole heartedly liked since...either eden or nathaniel....and why do all my men have nice names...lets see...christian, david, nathaniel, eden, ohad....out of which only christain and david were 'proper" boyfriends, nathaniel was an in between, eden was a prick that snagged me good, ohad is...too close to be labelled just yet. i dont' remember the names of all the guys i fucked...i remember the druggo...he was yoel....and there was the ukranian who's names was....hmm....itai, and there was ronen the 30 year old, and the 39 year old was called....hmm...damn i don't remember, and i even had unprotected sex with that cunt....hmm...and there are a few others i don't really remember very well....then there's aviv, who's my fuckbuddy/friend with benefits...whatever....who is...up till now, my favourite sexual partner, followed closely by ohad, then i guess it would be nathaniel, than christian, or maybe christian was before nathaniel on the good sex scale...but certainlly aviv and ohad have the peak. the worst would have to be ronen...who was a bad lover in every single way...bettered minimally by yoel the druggo...who's chest was shaved (ew) and who's cock was far too big for me to enjoy in any form. i know, everyone likes big dicks...i dont, never did
how did i get to this topic?
i sent my parents the news of my new tattoo along with the pictures....and one of my face so they remember what they're son looks like....though i'm a lot hotter now than i was back then when they were in my life. i sent it to them as a poem...a funny stupid poem...with hopes that it stings a little....can't say i'm not a bitch, but hey...some people get what's comming to them. they're feeling guilty over the dumbest things too....they're all apologetic coz they're going to see coldplay in concert and coldplay are supposed to be "my thing"...but i don't care, i'm happy for them, go see the concert, chris martin performs wonderfully....im happy that they have fun...if you want to apologise for something apologise for consistantly neglecting me in favour of my anorexic, borderline personality, obsessive compulsive cunt of a sister! apologise to my little sister too, for doing the same to her, in favour of that crazy bitch of an older sister....duh! like now it's too late for them with me, but at least learn from u'r fucking mistake and don't do it to the little girl....morons.
perhaps i'm a little harsh on them...call it a soft spot for me. In truth, for all their imperfection, i love my whole family very much...little shits that they are.
what's plaguing my mind is ohad...fucking ohad....ohad ohad ohad.