meow

Adam A's picture

i just woke up
it's 6am
i must leave an less than an hour to get to school on time
i m concered about my bathroom time
i wont take long i only gotta wash the face and bruth my teeth so that they're a sufficiently yellow colour again.
but my grandma threatens to wake up
and today she will spend half of eternity in there
her and my grandfather are roadtripping to be'er sheva today to pay respects to her father, they do it every year.
but she has to go on the bathroom
and for an hour she just coughs
not like a regular cough
it's a cough that starts low pitch and sounds artificial (which i believe it is)
then rises with each mincough
until it reaches a pitch similar to a jet
but in a "i'm fucking joking on a chicken bone" way, that just makes you want to throw a cat at her
the first time i heard it i thought she was dying, i seriously got out of bed in nothing but my undies to investigate
it's quite affective in doing two things
making me sick
and waking me up
god i don't feel like hearing it today
then she takes forever doing what ever it is little old ladies do in bathrooms
i suspect nothing
and comes out five minutes before i have to leave for school
just enough time for me to do what i need
and then she complains i block the bathroom each morning, it's a problem she says
im seriously going to go pick up some street cats and throw them at her, there's a white one downstairs that looks rather bitchy, i'll start with that one, and pick up some of the bigger cats in tel aviv on the way home and throw them at her when she comes back
now i'm going in the bathroom...before her!

Comments

Adam A's picture

meow

i know it's full of mistakes, fill in the blanks fuckers, i'm tiered and the coffee hasn't kicked in yet.

and sophie ellis bexter is annoying me, i'd turn her off but it requires energy
which is also why ive not been in the bathroom yet
why is it always colder in the bathroom?
i hate bathrooms
i think they're cold coz they're full of ghosts, you know people say ghosts make things cold. well that's why, the ghosts want to watch you shit piss brush u'r teeth and shower....perverted dead mother fuckers.
i need ruth my friend
she's so cute and comforting
i love religious girls
they love me too
something about "the nice sodomite" just does it for them
that and they keep trying to convert me
but ruth hasn't yet
god love her
well he does
i'm sure
but meh
SHUT THE FUCK UP SOPHIE ELLIS BEXTER GOD WHY THE FUCK DID I DOWNLOAD YOU!?