hi, it's strange that i'm writing this because i've been telling myself it'd go away after a while. but i guess what makes it easier is that im not sure if i am what im continuously thinking i am. i do not know if i am gay or not. i can't tell if i'm thinking i am cause i think that i could be or just cause im thinking of it period. the truth: i dont want to be gay. but the bigger truth: i'd rather know for sure. i'm 20. i've only ever dated girls and had sex with 2 or 3 girls. i say two or three cause the two i count were continuous partners and the third was regretable haha...
but i am currently with one of the continuous partners.. the other was my first real 3 yr. relationship and i consider to be the best sex of my life. but even when i was with her i still questioned my sexuality. here's why.. i think i may have fell in love with a friend many years back, or maybe not fell in love, but had strong sexual feelings for.... wow, never wrote that down for people to read before... ever.
anyways, nothing ever happened. i told myself, still tell myself, this was nothing more than thoughts that were'nt real, or maybe i was confused. i am confused. i cant say anymore without feedback. so.. feedback?
and i dont want you to just so, oh you're gay cuz it's not that simple, i never really check guys out or anything, i'm mostly turned on by girls. more detail when i know someones gunna listen and talk with me on the real.