"Carpet crunchers" and Easter weekend...

queercatholic's picture

Okay so, I've had a pretty odd last few days. I've just gotten my hair dyed an somewhat unconventional color however this was not after a loooongg fight with the woman people call my mother last night. She was going on about how having this color hair will make me look "like a carpet cruncher("a carpet cruncher is a woman who wants to suck another woman's vagina" according to her) and a "faggot". It's funny because she was protesting to me getting just one color in my hair because of those reasons. However, it turns out I couldn't get the second color in today due to lack of money and she ended up LIKING what it looks like with just the one color anyway. Too fuckin' bad for her cuz I threw her words right back at her and said I was making an appt. for tomorrow to get the second color put in. I said to her "won't it make me look like a CARPET CRUNCHER if I don't get the highlights in?!?!" I can't believe what comes out of my mother's mouth sometimes. She is so crude and I haven't heard someone use the term carpet cruncher before now...she was also going on about lesbian oral sex and asking me if I would ever do something like that and that she would never do anything like that with another woman. Anyway, fuck her, I just threw her words back at her and tomorrow I will have even MORE BEAUtiful hair!

This Easter weekend was particularly difficult for me as I have decided that I no longer feel that I am Catholic.(I'll keep my username the way it is though, because I am still gonna associate myself with said church until after high school because I like some of the people at certain church programs/activities) I didn't go to any of the important Catholic masses that are "mandatory". I pretty much only go to mass and church activities and programs because of the people I get to see there. Yes, I am deceiving people by pretending to be Catholic...but that's another whole post.

Thanks for reading, good to know I'm not alone!


jeff's picture


It's carpet muncher, typically. I don't think anything crunches down there.

They're deceiving people by claiming to have answers, so it all works out.

Addendum: it's usually rug muncher, as well. not carpet.
"People who are happy are slugs... They do not move the human race forward."
-- Camille Paglia, on Oasis

Merric's picture

"cruncher"? That's


That's scary.

I'm planning on getting my long, long hair cut short after graduation. My mom is worried, she keeps saying things like, "You're not going look like a boy, are you?" (by which I think she means, "like a dyke"). And she keeps thinking I'm going to do something drastic and look like a "freak." Hmm.

I still feel Catholic, I think... why should I let one aspect of Catholic doctrine that was probably developed long after the religion's birth ruin the whole faith for me? Unfortunately, other Catholics tend to see it as all or nothing. I don't think it's possible for anyone to agree with every single aspect of one religion. We just go with the one that's closest.

Peregrine's picture

heh i am an off and on

heh i am an off and on atheist and agnostic gay guy who attends a methodist church regularly for simalar resons.

"Love is patient. Love is kind." I will wait for you and I to be together. I will wait untill the end of the earth if I must!