How am I supposed to meet people?

stillgotlegs's picture

I haven't come out yet.
I am WAY too scared. My two best friends are a muslim and a very strict crhistian. How the hell am I supposed to come out if I know I'll loose them. TBH, I've never really heard their views on homosexuality or anything like that. I love them both (but not like that) and I really don't want them to completely reject me....

Also I saw posts about groups and stuff that people go to. I'm not that old... like 15? Does anyone know about any groups in the Hertfordshire area? It seems like the least gay place in the country sometimes... There are quite a few gay guys, but no lesbians (that I know of :P)

jmy's picture

Hey, Before coming out to

Before coming out to your friends maybe you should bring up homosexuality and hear their honest opinions about the topic and then if you feel like your ready and it will be best then come out to them, but make the educated decison.
If they are your friends then they will love you and accept you no matter what. And religion doesnt necissarily dictact beliefs. Just because they have a belief in god, it does not mean that they persoanlly are againt homosexuality. Talk about the general topic with them, see how it goes.

And for gay groups, i hear they are really really great, i havent been to the one here yet although ive been thinking about it heaps. You should googe your area and gay youth groups and see what you phone, or look in a phone book. If you are interested in meeting other LGBT people and learning about your sexuality then gay groups would be a great place. Gay group may also help you come out to your friends. Most groups dont have an age bracket so being 15 should not and probably will not effect you.

Anyway, if you ever need to talk, send me a PM :) I will always listen and give you the best advice i can,
oh and i see your new, so welcome to oasis!!

X Jmy.

holahaveamuffin18's picture

hi! queer 15 year old here!

hi! queer 15 year old here! :P
wow, that was dorky...
uhm, anyway.. i totally agree with what jmy said.
when i started coming out with my friends, i first brought up homosexuality around them. after a while, i was like, what the hell... they won't care, so i told them, and they've been behind me ever since. two of them are pastor's daughters, and very religious, but love me just the same.

& with the gay groups, you could check if you're trying to find one near your city/town. i found one only a few minutes drive from my house when i looked, and i'm planning on starting a GSA (Gay/Straight Alliance) at my high school soon. so, that site really helped me with this.

i've been out for about two years now, and most of my queer friends i met on here.

uh, anyway.. (: if you ever want to talk or have questions, PM me (or anyone here, really) because that's what we're here for!

oh! and welcome to Oasis!!!!

Sykes's picture

try googling for P-FLAG or

try googling for P-FLAG or other associations that have offices by you.
"It's more addictive than pistacios... Well, have you ever eaten just one pistacio?"
- Abby from NCIS

mcuraddoc's picture

It Doesn't Matter

In the end, I sympathize with your situation. I do. I lost several friends when I came out of the closet. And, the previous postings glean a good suggestion...perhaps it's better to find out how your friends view homosexuality before you announce it? Then, when you do, you will be better prepared for their reaction. Please make no mistake, you do need to be honest with them and yourself and tell them the truth. But, having this information ahead of time will put you in a better emotional position.

Good luck! We're all waiting for you!

the ghost's picture

Hey there, my best friend is

Hey there, my best friend is a muslim and when I came-out to her she took the news just fine. People generally do though. It's cliche but it does show who your real friends are. She simply isn't bothered by it, because she loves me too much. Chances are your friends will be of the same opinion. I know it seems easy to say and when I was in your position things did not seem so clear cut, but really its how they are.
Also when you are in the closet, the world seems like the straightest place ever. But once you make the effort to seek out some gay places a whole new world opens up that was always there you just couldn't see before.
Try googling for lgbt places in your area and make contact with them. Good luck, things will work out. It may be a struggle where you are at the moment but things do come together nicely. Good luck.

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent-Eleanor Roosevelt

jeff's picture


Technically, if people desert you when you let them know who you truly are, you didn't lose friends. You just found out you didn't have true friends.

"People who are happy are slugs... They do not move the human race forward."
-- Camille Paglia, on Oasis