I Tasted Shit.

centerfielder08's picture

So, last night almost came to be my death date at the young age of eighteen. Today's been pretty okay, besides my other almost attempt. God I need help. I need the ER so bad, yet I'm so scared. Should I go? Especially after what I did yesterday to myself? Luckily I don't have any marks.
Please...I need to tell my story. Thankfully I failed. For the first time, I'm happy to fail. Well, not really.

Comments

centerfielder08's picture

When's the right time to go

When's the right time to go / how do I know if it's the right time?

fox333's picture

go where?

go where?

fox333's picture

are you ok?

are you ok?

centerfielder08's picture

go to the hospital. no. i

go to the hospital. no. i think i'm dying.

fox333's picture

*HUG* i wish i knew

*HUG* i wish i knew something to do! but if you think ur dying to to the hospital. if this is what i think it is about there is never a wrong time to go get help.

centerfielder08's picture

what do you think its about?

what do you think its about?

fox333's picture

suicide?

suicide?

centerfielder08's picture

yes.

yes.

centerfielder08's picture

suicide. oh god, even the

suicide. oh god, even the word is blissful, beautiful.

fox333's picture

i used to feel suicidal,

i used to feel suicidal, well not as badly as you seem to, but please go get to the hospital. are you seeing a doctor?

Peregrine's picture

ELI!!!!!!! DON'T YOU

ELI!!!!!!! DON'T YOU DARE!!!!!!!! IF YOU KILL YOUR SELF YOU KNOW WHAT ME AND MY AWESOMENESS WILL DO!!!!!!!!

"Love is patent. Love is kind." I will wait for you and I to be together. I will wait untill the end of the earth if I must!

centerfielder08's picture

kind of .i have a program at

kind of .i have a program at the hospital 3 days a week. the one person i trust most i see once a week (Emme) and the other person i trust a lot i see 2 times a week (Rai). but i cant talk to them over the weekend. im screwed. WHAT do i do? im seeing Emme tomorrow but, not until late afternoon...4pm. so should i call ahead of time or just wait? i cant wait much longer.

fox333's picture

CALL

CALL

Icarus's picture

here's my two cents...

you know what? SCREW THIS FUCKING SHIT.

you wanna kill yourself? i dare you to.

you wanna go to a hospital? GO TO A FUCKING HOSPITAL.

you're so full of shit i can smell it through the computer screen. this is a sad ploy to gain attention from those around you because you don't feel like you've been loved enough as a child. you exist to make people fawn over you and to create chaos.

you are (supposedly) eighteen-fucking-years-old. you are a legal adult. you can do as you please.

so for those of you falling in love
keep it kind, keep it good, keep it right
throw yourself in the midst of danger
and keep one eye open at night.
--"Elephants" Rachel Yamagata

Peregrine's picture

Awww is someone pmsing?

Awww is someone pmsing? don't be to harsh on him. he is trying to get help.

"Love is patent. Love is kind." I will wait for you and I to be together. I will wait untill the end of the earth if I must!

Doctor Beastly's picture

Just jump...

...and never look back. You'll only know if you try. Dying does not have to be as dreadful as the world puts it out to be. All you have to do is know how to play with Death. He can be a sweet heart at times. But for me I , love it when he's in a raging form. I love the misery and dread.

Peregrine's picture

okay now if he kills himself

okay now if he kills himself i will beat the living SHIT OUT OF YOU!!!!!!!

"Love is patent. Love is kind." I will wait for you and I to be together. I will wait untill the end of the earth if I must!

RegretShouldntExist's picture

OH plzplzplzplz Calm Down

OH plzplzplzplz Calm Down Everyone...Plz i hate fighting....Hes not gonna kill himself..BUT if he does Aaron plz oh plz for me and everyone else plz dont hurt anyone

Doctor Beastly's picture

Distance plays in favor

Life is enjoyable, but that feeling can fade at any rate. What you make out of the times of gloom will be what you make it to be. I will shed no tear for what comes from this. Only sit back and watch what centerfielder deals out to play. I have not given a prescription nor have I call my friend to end the game. So sit back and let what happen go. For when that river starts a flowing, there may be no man made solution to stop it.