God came to me in a dream and said,
“Hey Greg, have you ever realized
that only crazy people are blessed with visions of me?”
I said, “Why, yes God, that is true, if only for the fact
That the people you choose to contact fail to realize that
Your presence is but a dream.” I said as several pink
flamingos flew by my head.
God expressed a great, booming laugh, “That is why I have come
to you, my child. I wish for you to partake in everyday deeds and relish in
the triviality of it.”
I pondered aloud, “God told me to buy some groceries.”
“Indeed,” said God, “I have gotten a bad rep from this silly
war on terror. It was never my intention. Allah is a buddy of mine,
we drink on alternating Tuesdays. I call it ‘Tuesdays with Allah’.
Something of a throwback to 'Tuesdays with Morrie'. I’ve never read it.”
I began to question God’s decision to show himself
in the dreams of a homosexual, agnostic, liberal vegan.
Before I could voice any opinion, however, God said,
“Shut the fuck up with the stupid shit in your brain and do as I say,
for I am the Lord your God, whether you believe in me or not.”
Soon I woke up and did as God told me.
I mean, what the hell choice did I have? The message was clear.
Before I woke up, however, God had one more thing to say,
“Greg, please write this down in a clumsily metered poem.”
And it was good.