alright i'm not gonna bother with typing correctly right now cause i don't give a shitt
just wanna get everything out.
here goes nothin.
[that's a nevershoutnever! songg(:!!!]
i'd never cheat on my girlfriend.
i think about it all the time.
i mean alot.
anddd i talked to this girl about it yesterday
we had a hellla risque conversation
and we planned to chill...and stufff.
like i actually planned to cheat on my girlfriend with this whole elaborate thing.
and at the moment
i didn't care.
i always pretend i don't give a shit.
who am i pretending for?
it doesn't do me any good.
it doesn't do anyone else any good.
i love analisa.
and i'm sending these vibes out to the world like i don't give a rat's ass.
but i do.
just because i didn't see her for a month while i was gone, and she'll be out for another month at her camp.
i care about her so much and i plan on being with her for a long time.
i'm just...maybe it's trying to be the whole man thing.
i'm gonna be a male so i'm practicing.
but that's not excuse for how i've been acting.
and that girl from last night? i texted her a three-part text about how i wouldn't go through with it, i couldn't, i care about analisa too much and i would never cheat on her ever. i care about my friend but like i'm never cheating on my girl.
i recognize all of this about myself but i'm not proactive about it.
i really feel i should be.
working on it.