I'm so glad I'm out of Maryland. This is what I've been needing, time away from everything: work, my home based family, basketball, friends. Time for myself. I' going to get sober again, I promise it to everyone. No one thinks I can do it, and I don't blame them anymore. I'm just looking forward to the next two years, graduating and leaving for California. Hopefully my view on life will change after this week and maybe things will be better again. Who knows?
California will be a new start for me, going back to the place where I grew up. It'll be my own new beginning, new people, new adventures, new love (Maybe even old love, if we reunite). Who knows?
I feel bad, sort of. Sometimes I feel like I was too clingy, and I hate clingyness. The truth is I just wanted to talk to you, be with you, show you that I actually liked you. I don't honestly and genuinely like people often, it takes a lot really. You were and are my perfect ideal partner, and who knows? Maybe I'll find someone like you. You showed me that there were and are more people out there. Now I guess it's time for me to find the one after you. Who knows?