*tugs the kleenex closer*
i can't even really put my thoughts into words right now just because...to write them sounds so selfish and so stupid and so just....ugh. *sighs*
i'm sure watching intervention doesn't help any.
i don't even know what happiness is anymore. i don't know what i means to be content...or happy anymore. i have moments of happiness i suppose, but they last maybe a little while and then i'm just...blank.
i don't even care anymore. i wanna say what i'm feeling, but it just feels so pretentious and so stupid and so whiny.
no one understands me.
i don't have any friends.
i disappoint everyone.
just one big fucking disappointment to everyone i meet.
i'll never be truly happy.
i'll never meet anyone.
i'll just have to meet everyone's pity-filled gaze as they reassure me again, "Oh, you'll meet someone. There's someone out there for you. Blah, blah, FUCKING BLAH."
i'm sick of it.
i'm sick of talking about it.
i'm sick of thinking about it.
i'm sick and tired of being my own worst fuck-up.
i'm sick of people telling me to just suck it up, get over it, everyone goes through the same shit. awesome. thanks for the fucking advice. yeah, i know i should suck it up, but sometimes i need some fucking sympathy.
oh god, fuck it. i'm in a horrible mood.