Show has been postponed on count of rain. I just had to tell a very upset bf that Untill I know what I mean to him, the wedding is off. His proposal never happened. I really hope I am still engeged but I just don't know anymore...
Enjoy my misery Childish Heartless Bitch, I know you think I deserve it. I really don't give a fuck. I just wanna be with Mat/cry because hes gone...
"I'm not the one who's so far away, when I feel the snake bite into my Veins! Never did I wanna be here again, and I don't remember why I came."
I DO believe I messaged you saying despite I was upset with you I wished you the very best. Stop calling me childish; by holding onto it and bringing it up at every moment you seem childish, not me, who has already moved on. Besides, you claim not to care about me at all, or my feelings, that you're so 'hard'. So why you still so hung up on the damn fight? I don't matter, right? Do not call me names and don't assume things. I heard an awesome saying once, 'assuming makes an ass of u and me'. Good saying, though I don't think we're facing a zombie apocalypse. I don't laugh when you're on the ground and kick you when you're down. Actually, I'm really sorry for you because I know you were just ecstatic about it; the only reason I didn't like the idea was because I worried you might be diving in a little unprepared.
And you tell him YOU'RE calling off the wedding? And then you're worried you're not engaged anymore? And on top of that, you're blaming ME? That doesn't quite make sense? Make amends with him while you can, if it's that you're confused with your relationship, you did right telling him to postpone, and if he doesn't understand, he doesn't deserve you.
and by proposal never happening, you mean you made it all up?
so for those of you falling in love
keep it kind, keep it good, keep it right
throw yourself in the midst of danger
and keep one eye open at night.
--"Elephants" Rachel Yamagata
No he really did propse, and I really did say yes. I went this morning and told him I decided if it ends he is ending it, because I couldn't bear to do that to him. I love him too much to hurt him like that...