Help for a friend please!

Alyska's picture

So, my friend just got a new (not) boyfriend. We shall call him J. Now J was at a party, and during this time someone outed him to his parents, which didn't take it well, at all. When Id-Boy (my friend) went to see him the next day, J's parents were really rude to him, and no one would leave them alone.
Well, after that (it's been a couple days) J's parents were just getting worse, and they've been treating J (and Id-Boy) like absolute crap, to the point that the next time Id-Boy saw him, he couldn't stop crying. It getting really, really bad, and J's thinking about running away from home, but can't because his parents would call the cops. I was just wondering if anyone had any advice for him, anything to help him get through this.
Thanks in advance.

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oldfoxbob's picture

"J" need to make a phone call

He needs to call the local GLBT( or LGBT however you want to call it)center or hot line. They will have resources and persons there to talk to and to help in this type of situation. Its hard when a family will not except their own for who and what they are. How old is J and Id-boy? If they are 18 or older then they can move out with out parental permission. If they are 14 and older they can go to the court and ask to be emancipated and then live on their own, however the financial situation is not always the best that way. The "Boys and girls town" hot line can offer some suggestions also and help. Also a note to you, keep an eye on both of them as many many times when this happens the persons "outed" will kill them self, and that is the last thing that needs to happen as it makes us all hurt then. If the GLBT and Boys town hotlines do not help then look to a MCC church or local minister who is known to be "Liberal" and may be gay friendly to assist in the intervention of the family as councilor. I hope this helps you with "J and Id-boy" Good luck.
Oldfoxbob

Genius is not a sign of intelligence, but rather
that of common sense. Humor is the best pain pill.

Alyska's picture

Thanks.

I really appreciate the help, and I'm sure they will too.
Oh, and J is turning 18 in October, and Id-Boy's 17.

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"When you can't walk you crawl, and when you can't do that you find someone to carry you" ~Firefly

oldfoxbob's picture

another suggestion then.

Since J is turning 18 in Oct. Tell him to start looking for a job and save money up to move out. Tell Id boy the same thing so that when he is 18 he can move in with J and they can share the rent and utilities on the apartment they have. With both working and saving when Id boy turns 18 they should be able to get a nice place with a good down payment which is usually the first and last month payment. ( Can be upwards of $2000)
Utilities also require down payments to start up new customers. However most (not all) will allow payments towards the deposits. Do they live in a big city ( NYC Chicago etc) or smaller towns ( population around 100,000 or less) This will determine the amount needed by them to get a place to live for the two of them.
I do hope things work out for them, and you are a good friend to seek help for them also.
Oldfoxbob

Genius is not a sign of intelligence, but rather
that of common sense. Humor is the best pain pill.

Alyska's picture

Thanks again.

Both Id-Boy and J live in smaller towns, maybe around 5,000 at most in J's town.

Thanks.
I do try to help my friends as much as I can. They're my chosen family, and they deserve the best that they can get.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"When you can't walk you crawl, and when you can't do that you find someone to carry you" ~Firefly