re-confusion ><

tenmilestilts's picture

So...don't really know where to start.

K, my crush/bff, was starting to like this guy in her gym class. Then he got her number and they started texting. Then he asked her out. It was a major freak-out for me. I was actually tutoring when she told me, and I had to like tell the girl I tutor I needed to go outside for a sec. That night was the first time I'd cried over K.

That was...three weeks ago? Four? Something like that. And I decided, number one, I was gonna be a good friend and support her in this and not start avoiding her; and number two, I wasn't gonna try to get over her. Which, maybe the second one was a foolish decision, but I knew from experience that I'm not good at falling out of love. I told myself that they wouldn't last til Prom...and if they did, then I would start trying to move on.

I did a good job, too. When her little sister's friend was asking questions about him, I laughed at her red face. I said nice things when she couldn't text me cuz she was doing something with him. And a couple weeks ago, when she wanted to tell me something, I was there. She told me they'd made out for the first time last night, and that it was "just kinda gross". I told her, as a friend would, to just tell him she wanted to go slow. But inside I wondered if maybe she didn't like him enough. And thought that maybe she didn't like guys at all, if kissing grossed her out. Then I mentally slapped myself and put myself back into the best friend shoes.

In the last week, she started wondering to me if maybe she didn't like him enough. She knew she didn't like him as much as he liked her, and she was stressing over their relationship and even, she told me, avoiding him. I told her that she should do what felt right, but was a relationship really worth it if it caused more pain that happiness?
Tuesday and Wednesday nights she kept me up late, unable to sleep because she didn't know what to do. I gave her what advice I could and tried to distract her, but secretly hoped that this might be the end.
Thursday night she told me she was texting him, and he asked what was up with her recently, and she said she needed to talk to him. He asked her if they were breaking up and she said yes.
She texted me, saying "I didn't want to do it over text!" I sent her "*hug* i'm sorry". *explodes* she said, and I replied with *starts picking up the pieces*.

Now I'm in a dilemma. I know how much it hurts when she falls for someone else now, I know how strong my friendship with and love for her are, and I know what happens when I don't speak up. But they only just broke up, and I know I should wait. But how long? And I'm afraid that, even with what I've learned, I'll be too chicken to tell her. Advice?

Sorry for the long rambling journal. –.–


fox333's picture

Well if you ever need

Well if you ever need someone to talk to pm me. I am an expert at falling out of, well maybe not love, but feelings.

I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
Oscar Wilde

tenmilestilts's picture

thanks! i will pm you if i

thanks! i will pm you if i need to spill.
Two wrongs don't make a right but three lefts do!

lamb_da's picture

oh wow

you're a really good friend, i'd love to have a friend like you :D
that's really brave of you, to do that, giving advice and stuff
*hugs* it's good to let it out sometimes
*awwww* the part about you picking up the pieces were cute

so, wait, you plan on telling her you like her?
i'm confused...

That's so straight. No, seriously.

tenmilestilts's picture

thanks. it was hard, but i

thanks. it was hard, but i knew that if i couldn't be a good friend in hard times i definitely wouldn't deserve to be her gf.

i had given myself my b-day as a deadline for telling her--oct 30th. then he asked her out like a couple weeks before that. and i still do want to tell her, but...=/
Two wrongs don't make a right but three lefts do!

lamb_da's picture


>A< *hug* that sucks...i should give myself a deadline in telling blue that i like her....

That's so straight. No, seriously.