I'm destroying my own life. Piece by piece. Don't ask me why. I don't know. I can't help it.
I'll be dead soon, if this goes on.
Seems like "I'm destroying my own life" and "I can't help it" are in conflict, since the former seems to have intention, but the latter seems passive. So, probably more like "I don't want to stop it" would be more accurate, since that would be more resignation than passivity.
Either way, you should just stop whatever it is that you're doing.
"People who are happy are slugs... They do not move the human race forward."
-- Camille Paglia, on Oasis
Hang in there, okay? I know you've been struggling. But I also know you're a person with a lot of creative energy, and you can find your way out of this.
There is always a choice. Don't make it self-destruction.
u know that we love u and that we would NEVER let anything destroy u
stop letting it go on, it will only make things worse if u dont stop it,
u are amazing and i now that you can do this, u can survive
save urself from the worse