I don't wanna be in love...! (and a poem)

Dracofangxxx's picture

I don't wanna love damn Jonah. I've got so many other sweet boys to like. Luckily they're awesome to me, and I might have a chance. Played some Battleship with Jeevan today. He's so funny! We were laughing so much, haha, and I almost asked him out...

But then I chickened out. Lulz. I instead asked him if he liked playing tuba more than trumpet. Hmm. I want to date him or Garret. I'm getting antsy. I'm too scared to ask them D:

Anyways enough talking. Bleh. Here's a random poem.

Love Prevention Machine

I have to fight, I have to fly
My sweetest escape, my final goodbye

It's time to go, I have to leave
I cannot stay , I cannot breathe

Causing myself to always bleed
That pain is something that I need

Freedom is like a breath of fresh air
I'm all by myself, you're not there

I wonder if this is what I needed
A life where I am not mistreated

By all the people I adore
I just can't take it anymore...

Can't take all the attention
I need a bit of love prevention

Oh yeah, love prevention machine
Take me to a place I've never seen

Hold me in your metal arms
Wake me with your loud alarms

Keep me sane and keep me awake
Always give and never take

See that I can keep away
From love until another day

He was not ready, he was not right
To live the life and fight the fight

I know out there, there is another
A good and strong protective lover

For them I'll wait a thousand years
I will cry a million tears!

Until the day that I will meet
Someone who will press "Delete"

On the keyboard of my mind
And so my memories will unwind

Forgetting all my darkened past
Our love will forever last.

And then I'll start all over again.

Comments

elph's picture

I Like It...

Pick the one you dream the most about... and run with it. If you have difficulty in making up your mind, listen to Chad's advice :-)

Dracofangxxx's picture

I dream about neither. I

I dream about neither. I dream about Jonah every night still...

Such bittersweet dreams...
-
Sometimes I like to sit at night and stare at the lamppost because it's the brightest thing in my life...

patnelsonchilds's picture

Some people take years to

Some people take years to get over. Some you never do fully. When you find another, that person usually recedes into the background, occasionally popping up to annoy you at inconvenient times. But life goes on, and the pain of remembering eventually fades.

Don't stop and wait for Jonah to get out of your head. He's likely to sta there, quite comfortably, until you find another tenant and relegate Jonah to the tiny room in the back of your mind.

Hugs,
Pat
_________________________________

- Pat Nelson Childs
"bringing strong gay & lesbian characters to Sci-Fi & Fantasy"

Dracofangxxx's picture

Thank you so much

It's comforting to have someone new comment on my journals- I thank you for that. And yeah, I understand what you mean. We were together for a year, it should take about that much at least for me to get over him, I'm guessing.

*hug*
Thanks, Pat :)
-
Sometimes I like to sit at night and stare at the lamppost because it's the brightest thing in my life...

jeff's picture

heh...

Putting "poem" in the title is like my Kryptonite. ;-)

---
"Wanting to be someone else is a waste of the person you are." - Kurt Cobain

Dracofangxxx's picture

Haha good to know! I write

Haha good to know! I write an awful lot, so I hope that's alright :)
-
Sometimes I like to sit at night and stare at the lamppost because it's the brightest thing in my life...

jeff's picture

sure...

Don't let me stop ya...

---
"Wanting to be someone else is a waste of the person you are." - Kurt Cobain

Fiona Rosge's picture

hm

Hey are you okay? I wish I knew what to say to you but besides somthing like you have a chance and in the end it will be alright, I really don't know what to say...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Come Josephine in my flying machine
Going up she goes up she goes
Balance yourself like a bird on a beam
In the air she goes there she goes
Up, up, a little bit higher
Oh, my, the moon is on fire
Good-by

Dracofangxxx's picture

Yeah, I'm ok :) I've been

Yeah, I'm ok :) I've been getting better every day. Better, stronger, happier... It's nice. Thanks for caring though! <3
-
Sometimes I like to sit at night and stare at the lamppost because it's the brightest thing in my life...

Wolfcry's picture

ask jeff, I am NOT good with

ask jeff, I am NOT good with the hugs and love section. on Isle Homo, I am the leader of our gothic boarder guards... and our rainbow watchdogs. we are just on the other side of the river Vagina.

"And yet, to say the truth, reason and love keep little company together nowadays." -William Shakespear, A Midsummer Night's Dream, Act 3, Scene 1