My computer got a virus yesterday.
My dad spent all day today fixing it for me. I love him so much <3 He's the best daddy evarrr.
Sorry for being gone, my best buddy H came over and spent the night.
Either way, I'm messing around with Sibellius trying to write music. It's very, very fun. I just start with the viola line, and bam- Music XD
I feel so... Sleepy. Fuzzy. Neh.
I don't remember the past clearly. It feels like I could have easily dreamed it all... I think I'm falling down from my "High".
Sigh. I've got too much time to think. It bothers me. Because then I get things stuck in my head and it hurts. But I suppose it's not so bad if I just draw them out or write them out like this. Or play them out, but that's alot harder to do. Music may be my drug of choice, but it's not working so well today...
I feel sick... I hope I can like, stay home from school tomorrow...
I wonder, sometimes, if maybe... Maybe I shouldn't hate 67 (I would not use that name, but I feel like it protects privacy better. Plus... I guess it makes me feel better about myself, but that's a selfish reason) but I feel so angry with her all the time. Especially angry when she doesn't have the courage to stand up to me and tell me to stop doing things she doesn't like. I think I might crave for her to just talk to me- about anything, just come back to me and be normal, not this wannabe copy of myself... You know? H and I were discussing comedy- She used to be so funny, we'd just have these inside jokes of comebacks she'd say to things that I'd say... Now the only funny things she says are things that happen AROUND her. I miss the old hilarity that she had.
I have no idea where I'm going with this. We're hopefully playing Perseus by Soon Hee Newbold in orchestra, and I am trying so hard to learn it...I'm doing alright. Here'a a link:
I've got the first page down. There's four pages. I am tired. I'm going to go play my 360 and maybe just... Lay down for a while. I finished my homework.
Here's a song to all the fighers, to all the haters;
wringing necks and writing checks,
Paying for blood on the street
And all those people you beat?
Aint dying alone, a life that you've thrown
To the trash, take a flash
To the past to see what could have been,
What should have been
But you took away, the empty hearted
Only fight for their own, it's shown
When you fight to earn, you first gotta learn
That every life's price is thrice what you get
From the dirty street boys, no joys, in their life,
Only strife, because maybe sometime
Someday, someone like you came along
And did them so wrong, like a song, you came
and went with no repeats, only one single sheet
Of paper to read, when you did your deed,
Cast away a heart right from the start
And ruined the life that could have been.
What the frick? I fail at rapping.
But that was sorta stream-of-conscious writing O___O
I feel like I should delete it, but it's sorta neat to me. I'll leave it. Ignore it XD
Sometimes when I'm with H, she makes me feel like... Like I'm better than I really am. Like I'm funnier, nicer, more polite...
I dunno. Maybe I just am because she is to me...
Love you, H <3