I was in New England recently. On this school trip thing. We left late Saturday night, and got back late last night.
Hooray for late nights.
Anywho, I was going to post a description of it, but my computer fialed last night, and when I was almost finished, somehow I pressed the space bar and got the back button instead, and it moved me to my previous tab, and my journal was gone.
And I have decided it shall remain unposted. Re writing stuff is boring, and I think a description of my trip would just bore all of you too.
We can ALL do with less boredom in our lives. That is one thing we do not need a speck of.
Well, about the title of this journal, we visited Strawberry Fields on the edge of Central Park in New York.
On the ground there, there is a mosaic, and it says in the center, just "imagine".
I don't know what it means, but I think it may have something to do with John Lennon, because it's within sight of where he got gunned down by the biggest asshole in the world, Mark David Chapman.
(He did it for the sole reason of wanting the fame of killing John Lennon. Get a life, and get famous for something worthwhile, dick.)
This morning, I woke up and checked my phone. I sleep with my phone next to me full volume, as it is how I get up on time.
So, theoretically, a text would get me up.
I saw this, from one of my roomates from the trip: "Hey, if anyone's missing a phone charger, I have one that isn't mine."
Then, my reply: "Imagine"
His reply: "What?"
I agree. What?
I have no memory of any of these texts. I've heard of sleep walking, but sleep texting? Why didn't it wake me up? And the instant we left Strawberry Fields, that mosaic left my mind forever, or so I thought. Was my unconscious mind continuing to think about it? Weird.
Why "imagine"? This is freakin me out.
I got to swim today, for the first time in over a week. I swam last Wednesday, then got sick, then left. I'm still a little sick, and a little out of shape now, but I think I'll be okay for school season, which starts on Monday.
Finally, I've been having recent problems.
On that school trip, there were a lot of horny guys.
And they spent all of their time picking out hot girls to harrass. And get their numbers, and all of that crap straight guys do.
Consequently, this has started me being disgusted with myself. With my gayness.
This happens sometimes, anyway, but now, it's just getting so so much worse.
I've spent the past couple days just being absolutely disgusted with myself. Freak.
Usually I can come back to myself, but it's getting harder now.
God, it's just so f***ing GROSS that I like boys. Just disgusting.
Freak, ain't I?