Trying to figure myself out

Zephyrasta's picture

...I hope this is the right place to ask this... I think I may be (mtf) trans, but I'm not positive. I remember wanting to be friends with girls back in elementary school, playing pretend games. I remember hating to go into the boys bathroom because there were boys in there, and I remember hating taking my shirt off in public, because girls didn't do that. I remember dressing in my sister's clothes whenever I got the chance. I'm trying to figure this out, but a second opinion would be appreciated.

Riku's picture

I can't tell you what gender

I can't tell you what gender you are, that's something you have to figure out for yourself. Everybody is different, some people have a lot of signs from childhood, some people have very few. It's really up to how you feel and who you want to be. Imagine surgery and money and social acceptance weren't an issue, would you rather live as female or male? Somewhere in between?

You can ask me stuff or PM me if you want. I'm a trans male and I've been out for a while so I might be able to help you out.

Zephyrasta's picture

If those things were not an

If those things were not an issue, I would rather live as female. I have wanted to be female for a long time, but was unaware of the possibility of actually making it happen until recently. But then I think about how I am attracted to women, and I worry about the social acceptance of actually living life that way. Knowing that there are others who have similar feelings (be they mtf or ftm) does put me a bit more at ease though.

Riku's picture

Sexuality and gender are

Sexuality and gender are separate. There are many trans people who are also attracted to the same gender, like yourself. Personally, I'm attracted to people regardless of gender, but that doesn't make me any less male. There are many women (trans and non-trans alike) who like women, the 'rules' don't change for trans people.

And it seems hard socially, but you can find friends who accept and love you as you are, both inside and outside of the trans community, and it's better to live in a way that's honest and comfortable and have friends who appreciate you for you. I'm not going to lie, it can be very hard if the people you're already close to don't accept you. But it's important for you to live your life as who you are and be happy. You only live once.

fox333's picture

I am not trans but if you

I am not trans but if you need someone to talk to I am here.

A doubtful friend is worse than a certain enemy. Let a man be one thing or the other, and we then know how to meet him.
Aesop