AHH I'm taking a break to write shizz before bed

Dracofangxxx's picture

Panda, one of our leaders for Colorguard, is dating Ms. Ping, this other leader who teaches us dance. And today Ms. Ping was talking about how they're gonna get married soon and how they're planning the wedding and it's SO CUTE. Like, ADORABLE. And we're getting a new boy in Colorguard (who's freaking ADORABLE, by the way) and the first thing Ms. Ping asks is "IS HE YOUR BOYFRIEND?" to the one boy on our Colorguard who's very, very gay XD
Actually, he really reminds me of Swimmerguy :P

anyways, I need some... Advice? Or something?

Well, so, Blueboy and Turban are both at band camp with me. They talk to me, and it's pretty freaking awesome. I'm nervous and junk so I usually end up being awkward, but it's funny anyways, cuz they're both really hilarious and awesome.

(side note, I have a bad nosebleed AGAIN. And my knees are KILLING ME and I need to go to the doctor to get them checked out)

And well, I might be imagining this, but Blueboy keeps, well, staring at me and it's really weird. Either my legs or my hands or my face and I know that's probably me being paranoid but seriously...
And he touches me. Like, I know it's just play stuff, but... He'll fluff my hair or poke my sides and when I poke back he'll grab my arm and hand and he'll pull on it, or today he tried to untie my shoe and I tried pushing his hands away but he kept at it... and I could TOTALLY be imagining this intention, but he keeps bringing up stuff we used to do and laughing and saying "Oh yeah, good times, man"
and like.
Why is he so niiiiiiice to me? Damn, he's got a girlfriend. That isn't me. And they're not going to the same school, so I think he might be um... Liking me again or something? Because whenever I'm alone he's like a little hawk or something and swoops over to talk to me. I think he noticed that it's weird and didn't do it as much today...
He hugs me, too. Good ones, like the "Long embrace and then FWOOSH slide my hand across your hip when we release" type...
He said something about how "I always used to have a frown on my face, and that's how he remembers me" and we talked a bit about how I got over that phase and I'm pretty happy all the time now.

He looked taken aback. It's so weird! Either we're very good and awkward friends or... *shiver*

Weird thing is, if he's really giving me THAT look and stuff, I don't know whether to be excited or disappointed...

D'ya think I'm just imagining this? I think so, but... I dunno. What should I do???

Loving band camp, fo' reals, just super tired and sore...



625539's picture

"Long embrace and then

"Long embrace and then FWOOSH slide my hand across your hip when we release" type...

Usually, if a guy hugs me like this, I call it a "gay" hug, but you've finally found the proper words to phrase it for me :D

Otherwise... I've been in a few situations like that with people before and things have gone both ways. In my case though, when I thought was "imagining things" it was because I was actually into the guy and looking for any kind of signal. So if you're not into him and he's giving you that impression, it may be a correct one?

Or maybe he's just like that. Does he act that way with other girls?

Dracofangxxx's picture

Haha! I'm gonna tell him to stop giving me gay hugs now...

But yeah, I'm like, way over him... As far as I know! Maybe there's like, little ninja feelings there somewhere that are very good at their job?

He only acts that way with girls he likes! But then again, if I'm his ex, maybe that's the only way he knows how to be? Either a douche or a flirt?

Either way, thanks for the comment :)
You are beautiful, in every single way <3