I am so tired but do not want to go to bed.

Super Duck's picture

There was relatively no drama today until I was alone with my mom. She didn't start any shit with my dad or his girlfriend, but damn, she was awful to me today. My mom was totally pleasant on the way there, but I guess not being able to have her cigarettes got to her, because she went into straight-up bitch mode. She screamed at me for obeying the speed limit and not running over animals, and because I was so stressed by the task of driving for an hour and a half, I screamed right back. She also basically called me a man-hating, sexist bigot because I am only attracted to girls. I did totally fine at driving, and yet she would not stop nagging me. Eventually, she told me to pull over and let her drive, and I said, "You know what? NO." This shocked her into silence.

But yeah, we were eating lunch by ourselves after my dad and his girlfriend took my sister to buy a toy so that she'd stop whining. My mom mentioned one of my guy friends, and the following conversation ensued:

Mom: Is he gay?
Me: No, he's the straightest guy ever, actually. He's just very pro-gay.
Mom: OH, WHAT IF HE EVER LIKED YOU?
Me: He knows my preference.
Mom: BUT HE'S SO NICE! WHY WOULDN'T YOU DATE HIM?
Me: What? Umm, he's a nice GUY. As in, NOT A GIRL.
Mom: That is SO SEXIST!
Me: Ahaha, wait, what?
Mom: You would be rejecting him just because he's not a girl.
Me: That's because I am only attracted to girls. I cannot force myself to like guys. It does not work that way. That's like saying every straight girl I'm attracted to is a homophobe for only liking guys.
Mom: ...Oh. I feel so stupid now.

AND SHE SHOULD! We've been over this so many times. On a scale of heterosexual to French Class Girl, I'm a super-mega-ultra rainbow, which is pretty damn gay. See?

I guess I can't complain about my mom completely, though. My Wacom tablet broke, and the only one in Best Buy was out of my price range, so she agreed to pay a little of it. I cannot live without my tablet. I am always, always, always doing digital art.

FCG actually has a decent music taste. This blows my mind. How is that possible? She's supposed to be horrible at everything. What the hell, FCG? Why don't you listen to Miley Cyrus or something!?

Comments

Dracofangxxx's picture

HAHA THAT SCALE

IT IS AMAZING
For future reference, I'm right where the blue and green meet ;)
-
You are beautiful, in every single way <3

elph's picture

Hey!

A very neat new icon/avatar! No?

Dracofangxxx's picture

Oui!

Drew it myself. If you wanna see it blown up just throw me a PM and I'll show you :)
-
You are beautiful, in every single way <3

Super Duck's picture

And what might that be

And what might that be called? :D

jacjessen90's picture

i'm right around the yellow....

which sucks 'cuz i hate yellow except for eggs and the sun.

"to live a day alone, only THAT would be torture! An hour without you, only THAT would be death!" ~gomez addams

Super Duck's picture

Do you know what else is yellow?

FCG's hair. Does that make yellow extra gay?

Riku's picture

Haha. That is a lovely

Haha. That is a lovely diagram.

Ohman. My tablet broke ages ago, and I still don't have a new one. :[

It put up with years of me and did it's job quite nicely... But now it's gone. I want a new one but... This whole saving-up-every-cent business is kind of leaving me without a life, or a tablet...

Sorry about your mom. I can't stand when people nag me while I'm driving. If someone is being pissy about my driving ability, it just makes my driving that much worse. I would have had to pull over and put some loud music on or something.

Super Duck's picture

I had my previous tablet for

I had my previous tablet for 2 or 3 years. It worked great until this summer, when the cord finally started wearing out, and eventually the whole thing just quit.

I know, right? And the sad part is, it's not like my mom could do any better. She constantly texts and runs all over the road.

holahaveamuffin18's picture

hahaha. i love the "FCG" at

hahaha.
i love the "FCG" at the end :P
and i've had that argument w/ a friend before, so i just calmly told her "if i find a guy i like, i'll date him. but that's not likely."

jacjessen90's picture

lol...on that note...

my uncle once asked me why i was gay and said "... maybe you just haven't found the right girl...?" i replied "and maybe you just haven't found the right guy...?" "ok...i see what you mean...and i thought i did in college but no...." long story short, my uncle accidently came out as bi when he's raggin' on me for bein' gay! lol!!!

"to live a day alone, only THAT would be torture! An hour without you, only THAT would be death!" ~gomez addams

holahaveamuffin18's picture

hahaha. oh, that's awesome.

hahaha.
oh, that's awesome.

Super Duck's picture

Haha! My mom did something

Haha! My mom did something similar once the very, very first time I ever told her. "I used to experiment with girls back in high school, but I still married a man!"

Super Duck's picture

Haha, yeah, it's pretty

Haha, yeah, it's pretty great! And I guess I could say that if she asks again, but I'm like, literally 100% gay. :p

niks121997's picture

Hahaha

I loved that scale. And I liked how you handled your Mum's "sexist" comment.

Super Duck's picture

Thanks! I'm pretty good at

Thanks! I'm pretty good at coming up with responses for that kinda stuff; I hear it often.