hjyt76

Super Duck's picture

So, today one of my friends came up to me and told me some interesting news. (Quick note: French Class Girl does indeed know him, so it's not like he was a total creepo or anything.)

Him: A bunch of girls were playing with FCG's hair, so I went up and touched a piece to see what all the fuss was about.
Me: WHAT?
Him: It felt AMAZING!
Me: ...WHAT?
Him: She was loving it when the girls were doing it and seemed to enjoy it a little less when I did it. She asked them to do it harder. It sounded like she was having sex or something.
Me: Well, of course!
Him: I think you should go up to her and touch it today.
Me: NO! SHE'D LOVE THAT!
Him: But it feels amazing! Really, really amazing!

Well, in French class today, FCG asked me if her hair looked okay. I was sitting like, right next to her, so, uh... I... I'm really ashamed to admit this, but I, um, at my friend's request, I kind of... touched a piece. YES, I, SUPER DUCK, TOUCHED FRENCH CLASS GIRL'S HAIR FOR TWO WHOLE SECONDS! I am so ashamed. Soooo ashamed. And my friend was right; it didn't feel bad at all! UGH!

Oh, our freakazoid has made progress! She went from "I HATE ALL GAYS!" last week to "I guess I can kind of see why two really pretty girls would want to date each other" today! Ooooh~! She also told me all about her "98% lesbian friend." I can't help but wonder if she is actually referring to herself. Of course, I'd think she was more like 112% lesbian, but a 98 is still an A, you know? She also told me about the kind of girl she'd be attracted to if she was "gonna be gay." Quite unfortunately, I fit the criteria fairly well. Why? Just why? She made me come over to her and listen to this. Is this her way of saying she's attracted to me or something? She has called me cute before... OH NO! NO! NO! NOOOO! When I said I wanted girls to like me, I did NOT mean HER!

I got a bonus point and a smiley face on my history homework. Holy shit. I got a 6 out of 5! I never get full credit on anything in that class, let alone extra credit! I am going to frame that freaking piece of paper! Hahaha! Seriously, the homework is like, impossible. Oh, my mom freaked out on me today because I abused the word "like." I apparently said it 6 times in one sentence. I was not aware that I had this problem.

HOLY SHIT! I just realized my birthday is in like, two weeks. I reeeeeally wish I hadn't waited a little while to get my permit; it would be nice to be able to get my actual driver's license on my birthday. At least I already have my car, though! I really don't want anything for my birthday. I already got my present. It was that car. Unfortunately, my grandmother does not understand this and keeps straight-up nagging me to think of something I want. The only thing I don't have that I want is a girlfriend, and I don't think she can buy me that. Well, I guess she could buy me a prostitute, but that would be soooo awkward to ask for! She does this to me every year at my birthday and Christmas, and there hasn't been much I've wanted since I was 12 or so. It annoys me so much. The fact that my birthday and Christmas are only a little less than 2 months apart makes it even worse. I know she just wants to help, but "I don't want anything" means "I don't want anything!" Last year she actually said, "If you don't give me any ideas, I WILL go to Walmart and buy you some $5 junk I know you'll hate just for the sake of buying something."

Anyway, I'm about go to out to eat with my grandma. Apparently my grandpa is being a whiny asshole, and she is displeased. I'm sure she'll be in an... interesting... mood.

Comments

ReinbowGrl's picture

You love her!! You are

You love her!! You are falling under her spell!!! First you touch her hair...next her lady parts!! All you two need is one drunken night together!!! I am convinced!!

- - - - - - - -
I don't need company in the company of you. I don't need love, your love will do. And I've got you and you've got me and this is all you need. I don't need air, I don't need to breathe. I don't need rest, I don't have time to sleep.

Super Duck's picture

>:C

Riku's picture

Super Duck and FCG sitting in a tree...

Haha. You shouldn't have touched her hair, next thing you know you'll be under her thrall and you'll suddenly think she's the most amazing person ever like all of these other girls seem to...

Pfff. Nobody has asked me what I want for my birthday... And while I don't want anyone to waste their money/time on me, I kind of wish they'd ask... Haha. >_>

Also, your birthday is really close to mine, give or take a couple of years. I thought I'd mention this. :P

Super Duck's picture

:( I really regret touching

:( I really regret touching it. I was secretly hoping it would feel nasty and gross, but it was all soft and nice instead...

I don't mind if she asks once or twice. I only mind when she asks incessantly and threatens to buy me $5 junk she knows I won't use. D:

According to your profile, we are 2 years and 5 days apart! That's pretty cool! :3 I'm exactly 4 days older than one of my best friends.

Riku's picture

Haha, silly. I wonder how

Haha, silly.

I wonder how she does that, most people, when their hair gets touched a lot it becomes nasty and oily. Maybe she has magic hair.

Honestly, I'll probably be the same way when I'm a grandparent. "WHAT DO YOU WANT FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY? TELL ME OR I'LL BUY YOU SOMETHING YOU DON'T LIKE." XD; Though I can understand why that'd be annoying.

epicfailure's picture

Sounds like she's already

Sounds like she's already making moves on you. Good luck with that. Don't forget to keep your sanity.
If your really desperate, go for it. I would (maybe)

* Like what Shaggy said "it wasn't me"*

Super Duck's picture

I'm pretty desperate, but

I'm pretty desperate, but I'm not THAT desperate, I don't think...

epicfailure's picture

well there you have it. Your

well there you have it. Your having doubts.

* Like what Shaggy said "it wasn't me"*

jacjessen90's picture

oy..dein yenta gavalten meer auz plotz!

(sorry, just got off the phone with my friend who uses about as much yiddish in one sentance as jerry lewis does in 3 acts....)
*btw, "the bitch pains me till i burst" is what i said for the title, and it makes more sence in yiddish, i promise...*
@SD: love the bear pic! and i wouldn't freak out over this, cuz, yes, she may like you, and yes, she may be coming to terms with this, but this doesn't nesicerily mean that you have a future with her... so, if you are having those (flash-forward: SD, sitting in a tralier park, on the front porth of a camper;smokin' a malbaro, and drinkin' a beer, while FCG, is in the yard hangin laundry on the line and a few young'n's are runnin' round and wrasslin' on the mud in the yard like they tend to do when their mama's ain't watchin...)kinda thoughts, don't! it's not a gerentee, a distinct possibility but not a gerentee!....so, don't freak out yet...wait until FCG, makes a move at least, then you'll have a reason to freak....

"to live a day alone, only THAT would be torture! An hour without you, only THAT would be death!" ~gomez and morticia addams
"look at him! i would kill for him! i would die for him! either way what bliss!"~gomez addams

Super Duck's picture

Would I also be missing half my teeth?

I love the implication that dating her would turn me into a hilbilly. Hahaha! Oh, I really don't want to imagine that...

jacjessen90's picture

sorry.... i watch too much tv and i'm a country boi....

and i think that yes you would be missing your teeth but all not just some, and it wouldn't matter any way cus...
"I jus' got's me sum o' them-thar fancy store-bought choppers and got-dang but don' them sunsabitch's look good?"
lol..sorry couldn't resist...here's hopin' that you never have to turn into a clampett...and if you do, here's hopin' that you're even richer than jed and more beautiful than ellie mae! (and here's hopin' that you'll let me fill the role of 'granny/grampy clampett')

"to live a day alone, only THAT would be torture! An hour without you, only THAT would be death!" ~gomez and morticia addams
"look at him! i would kill for him! i would die for him! either way what bliss!"~gomez addams

Super Duck's picture

Don't be sorry! It made my day.

It's actually REALLY easy to imagine FCG as a hillbilly... Just knock a couple of her teeth out and get her to wear the proper clothing, and you're all set! I'd have to work on the accent, though, and hobbies and general way of life... Oh, and we'd both need more hillbillyish names and some hillbilly grammar lessons. But I can imagine hillbilly FCG like, PERFECTLY.

jacjessen90's picture

well, if you'll entrust me

well, if you'll entrust me with y'all's real names i'll run 'em through the 'clampett-izer' and get back with it's suggestions....and if you need help with the hillbilly grammour and all ask me, i've got it down perfectly....my gramma is one of those who actually "makes medicene" in her backyard...(yes, my gramma has a still, and yes i'm being truthful....)

"to live a day alone, only THAT would be torture! An hour without you, only THAT would be death!" ~gomez and morticia addams
"look at him! i would kill for him! i would die for him! either way what bliss!"~gomez addams

Super Duck's picture

Hahaha okay!

Hahaha okay!

lamb_da's picture

i am displeased with

i am displeased with you.

You're so beautiful, you made me forget my pick up line. ;)

Super Duck's picture

Awww, I am sorry. :( Is it

Awww, I am sorry. :( Is it because I touched her hair?

jacjessen90's picture

um...sorry?

...with me? or SD? cuz if it's me, i'm sorry....if you tell me what i did, i'll fix it...

"to live a day alone, only THAT would be torture! An hour without you, only THAT would be death!" ~gomez and morticia addams
"look at him! i would kill for him! i would die for him! either way what bliss!"~gomez addams

lamb_da's picture

superduck

You're so beautiful, you made me forget my pick up line. ;)

loreonpravus's picture

Theoretically, what would

Theoretically, what would make you desperate enough to hit FCG? (hit= hook up with, eheh)

For the past few years everytime somebody asks me what I want for Christmas/my birthday/ random occasion I've thought "hot girlfriend" in my head, but then I always say something lame like "gift card". ...

Super Duck's picture

If we were stranded on an

If we were stranded on an island alone together for a really long time, maybe.

I wish they made gift cards to buy hot girlfriends...

loreonpravus's picture

girlfriend gift cards?!

YES YES YES YES YES