the title are lyrics from a song. anyway, I finally packed my bags for group earlier with my journal entries printed out.
i handed them to my therapist today.
my brain feels cannibalistic.
what i learned of myself in group today: i have "magical thinking" ( an ACTUAL psychiatric term) .
im so scared. i dont like how my head feels. like its eating itself from the outside-in.
i didt have a car ride or a bus to take to group so i took a 2+ mile walk there. once i got there i realized that in my long walk there, i tore off much of the skin on the back of both of my ankles. luckily, in the building where the group therapy is, there are some people that had band-aids and something like neosporin, so they fixed up both of my feet...they looked embarrassingly grotesque.
ANYWAYSSSS...the group leader questioned me about yesterday and we had this huge talk (in front of the rest of the group) including her asking me about why my SI numbers were higher than usual :x/