I feel like I'm confessing to doing something bad or wrong, like pushing down an old lady or stealing candy bars from children. But I didn't do any of those things, so that's not what I'm trying to say here. In fact, what I'm confessing to is probably a thousand times worse than both of those put together, and I am NOT having an easy time typing this. My stomach is in knots, and I feel like the biggest loser ever. I guess it's time to be a big girl now and own up to it, though. Ugh. Please don't laugh, okay? It's really bad... I'm seriously thinking of chickening out when it comes to posting this, but if you're reading this, I didn't.
Today, I was at school, and I was in this one class with a few people. One of the people I was with was a girl, and I happen to feel a strange attraction to the girl in question. I have for a few weeks now, but it has gotten worse in the past few days. Anyway, this is relevant because said girl was whining about how no one likes her, as in like like, but that's obviously not true, because that contradicts what I just said. That's pretty normal, right? Well, uh, here's where it gets a little... bad. The class may or may not have been a certain foreign language, and the girl may or may not have been of the freakazoid species. And, um, by "may or may not have been," I mean "was." I can't believe I'm posting this. Oh, my god. I just can't even... I'm so sorry. I didn't think I had such awful taste in women, but I couldn't resist. She's no drop-dead gorgeous supermodel, but she is actually not as terribly, horrifyingly ugly as I say she is; I've always thought blonde hair and blue eyes were a huuuge turn-on. I find her freakishness a bit charming in a strange way. I secretly really, really liked it when she hugged me; she's warm, she smells nice, and she gives good hugs. I can't exactly figure out WHY I feel this way, though. Oh, and I already feel like the biggest idiot on the planet for succumbing to her spell, so you guys don't have to tell me that.
I didn't say anything to her when she was complaining, though, because she is, after all, so deep in the closet that she has a second house in Narnia. One of my friends saw her groping a girl yesterday. The girl was NOT happy. Do you know what's crazy, besides this entire post so far? Irritating Girl asked her if she had a boyfriend. Hahaha! Oh, and IG and I are becoming friends too, which is pretty weird itself.
Sorry for the random post. I felt like saying it after her complaints... It's also getting increasingly difficult to come up with solid reasons to deny it in the comments. Oh, and she leaves forever in May. What if I still feel like this then? What if she comes out of the closet?
If this has been too annoying to read, the summarized version is as follows: I, Super Duck, might have a little crush on the freakazoid, and it's the end of the freaking world.
Anyway, I'm gonna go curl up in a ball and die of shame now. This is so, so, so, so awful. I'm terribly sorry that I am so stupid, but 16-year-old humans have... hormones... and that makes us stupid sometimes, right? Oh, but I am so ashamed. :(