Coming Out Again.

centerfielder08's picture

Coming out is a fucking mess.

I've come out a few times now as trans. This is so ...weird.

Argh. This is...interesting.

Comments

MacAvity's picture

Hey!

Good for you! (Even if it is messy and weird.)

And what a relief to see you back - we've been worried!

centerfielder08's picture

:)----Thanks! Argh, I know.

:)----Thanks!

Argh, I know. I'm sorry.

funnyflyby's picture

Yes!

weirdness... it happens. I'm so glad to hear from you, but then you know that from my slightly psychotic pm. Good luck, I hope it gets more comfortable. :D :) :D ;) ;D ;)
Smiley armies once more.

centerfielder08's picture

No such thing :) Your PMs

No such thing :) Your PMs arent psychotic :p. dont worry. me loves returning to this site and seeing everyone here.

ive missed my baby rainbowsies. :p. lol.

:D
AND THANKS.

funnyflyby's picture

I'M A BABY RAINBOWSY!

Haha... I'm glad you don't think they're psychotic. I just sent another.
I had a funny mental picture of myself as a baby rainbowsy:
I'm about 3 feet tall with elf-like proportions, talking and looking like a Munchkin from the Wizard of Oz movie, dressed all in rainbows. A pointy rainbow hat, rainbow pants, a funny-looking rainbow shirt, and rainbow shoes with long, pointy, curled-over tips. And my hair is short (like I wish it was) and I'm not wearing my glasses. Everything I touch turns to rainbow! Magic rainbow-powers!
Wow... I'm a STRANGE baby rainbowsy. Yay!!!
Now I know what I'll be for Halloween next year! (haha... but that would actually be really funny.)

centerfielder08's picture

:D YAY. RAINBOWS ROCK MY

:D YAY. RAINBOWS ROCK MY WORLD.
ESPECIALLY FUNNYFLYBY RAINBOWS.
haha.
yes. :).
i wish my hair was short, too.

loreonpravus's picture

For me, the whole oh my

For me, the whole oh my gawsh I might be trans thing is more confusing than when I was figuring out I was gay. I guess the difference is other people versus yourself. When I was going through the gay identity issue, I was thinking more in terms of who I was attracted to. Now that that's pretty much been confirmed, I start to look at myself... and I am more confused by the day.

Can't I just be kind of a male/female hybrid? Because I feel like on the inside, I feel more of a man than a woman, but there are some things about being a girl I enjoy (and the fact that I find the female body is more attractive, but I'm hella biased) and that I wouldn't feel comfortable doing as a socialized male- swooning over girls, being squealy- actually, posting this comment is making me question myself again.

I think I could give up some female privileges if I were to gain the ability to attract a wider range of females, wear a suit and not have some people give funny looks to me, etc.

Holy bejeezus. I need to schedule an appointment with my counselor o.O

funnyflyby's picture

Male/Female hybrid

That's why I use the word 'gajindiak'. It works.

centerfielder08's picture

:) I say trans because some

:) I say trans because some people GASP dont think theres anything else beside man or woman.
i'm not man or woman. im somehow both. and neither. and everything in between.
it sorta changes each day...
but i know what you mean, or i think i do, loreonpravus. plus its like gender is more as what youre perceived to be in others' eyes.?right/

funnyflyby's picture

sigh

Gender is just another way for labeling humans to classify themselves... I just leave gender-filling-in things blank and say I'm a gajindiak. If people have a problem with that, it isn't my fault. My mother is beginning to refer to my brother and I as 'those crazy gajindiaks'. Well, her other one is 'people with failing senses of reality'. So...

lamb_da's picture

ah, htbrid would be

ah, htbrid would be awesome...or even be like those characters from sailor moon...i can't remember what they're called...that would be so cool, to be able to switch genders ^ w ^

You're so beautiful, you made me forget my pick up line. ;)

centerfielder08's picture

hopefully she doesnt use

hopefully she doesnt use those terms interchangeably...does she?

funnyflyby's picture

Hehe, no.

It's more like she thinks we're crazy because we have a new gender. Well, neither of us act particularly male or female, so gajindiak works just fine, thank you very much. I don't think she believes there's anything serious about our self-proclaimed gajindiakism. She probably thinks it's just a phase and we're getting a kick out of it, just like making up words, etc. Which is probably true in my brother's case. The question of who a gajindiak is attracted to hasn't actually come up yet. So it isn't as much interchangeable as it is that she takes the gajindiakitude as another sign of craziness.
We were supposed to write about our aspirations in History, for some reason, and I wrote that I aspire to make the world see that a specific gender isn't needed and there are many more than male and female. I stated that I'm a proud gajindiak. So let's see what the teacher thinks...

jeff's picture

Hmm...

Coming out never ends. I just started a new job this week, so the process starts all over again. I mean, I could care less if they know I'm gay, so there's not much drama, but I definitely make sure they know just cuz..

---
"Wanting to be someone else is a waste of the person you are." - Kurt Cobain

centerfielder08's picture

yeah, i understand waht you

yeah, i understand waht you mean, Jeff.

hm. no coming outs so far today. i did yesterday to a former english teacher of mine. it was scary. and im not sure i know why i did it necessarily, did i have to? probably not. but i did, because i felt like i really wanted to come out. gah. was it the best idea? im still unsure.

centerfielder08's picture

YAY, funnyflyby. I'll be

YAY, funnyflyby. I'll be eager to see what the teacher says, too!

funnyflyby's picture

I'll be sure to tell you!

Wow.woW