...to care. i could care less about things that i would be totally excited about or things that would usually make me sad. like yesterday was the first day i had ever had a friend over at my house, we had fun, but the usual me would have been ecstatic, and i was just...i don't actually know. we had fun, but not as much as we would have if i were not so depressed. i'm starting to think that i am actually depressed and not just sad. it's affecting me physically and mentally. i am not thinking things through and i haven't slept well in...i don't know how long. i'm stuck. i'm not sure where to go or what to do. i am honestly too depressed to care...about anything anymore. i want me back.