This is the first time I've been sober in a while. Kids, don't do drugs, they're going to kill you and drag you to hell. I mean that. Don't.
I'm not going to tell you what I've been on, but it's been tearing me apart. I can't stop, and I feel like I've brought myself so far down that I'll never be able to crawl back up. Sometimes I feel like it would be best for me, my family, and my friends if I disappeared. All I've done for them is cause them pain and make them fear for my safety.
I'm the example of what not to do. Instead of dealing with my problems in real life I decided to drown everything in alcohol. Then, when that wasn't enough, I started injecting.
The reason this started was because I hated my body. As it went on, I realized that I hated people as much as my body. That made things worse. I met a boy who I thought could save me, but all he did was drag me down further and walk away. I started drinking and injecting even more.
I stopped for a while there, but with recent developments I've found myself falling back on my old 'friends'. My closest friend still tries to help, and when he's around I feel stronger. But I don't last long after he's gone, and he has his own life to live.
Whatever you do, don't do what I've done. The only solution I can find is to just end this cycle myself. I need to find a way out.