Horrible friends, writer's block, and a new crush

radiosilence95's picture

Bleeehh. I'm really not in the best of moods today. All (well, most) of my friends are pissing me off. "I'll always be here for you Jenna!" they tell me. "You can always trust me Jenna!" What a load of bullshit. The second I come to them with a problem, they say "Oh that's too bad" and change the subject. As if this whole situation with Amber wasn't enough. Now I'm starting to realize that 90% of my friends suck. Fuck them. If I'm alone and having one of my famous self-pity moments, who do I call? Who do I turn to? Gah. I just don't care about anyone anymore. I know that sounds awful and selfish, but it's true. I. Just. Don't. Care.

I've just been Youtube surfing. I really could use a good laugh right now, and there's nothing like a hilarious Youtube video to cheer you up. I think I'll work on my poetry too. It's been so long since I've written anything, because I'm just not inspired anymore. Hopefully this horrible case of writer's block will pass.

I think I'm crushing on a girl in my pre-calculus. She's so beautiful and breathtaking. If only I had the nerve to start a conversation with her. I also feel guilty, because I'm stuck on Amber and I feel like I'm cheating on her, even though we're not dating and she's being hurtful towards me. Anyway, this girl is so...unique looking. A lot of high school girls look the same, if you ask me. At least that's how it is in my school. Same hair color, same hair style, same clothes, same fake, overdone makeup-y face...But this girl looks different. Sometimes she catches me looking at her and I try so hard not to blush. She seems so nice and sweet. Her laugh is adorable. I desperately wish I could speak to her. She could be just the person I need to get over Amber.