Labels and Other Things

galaga's picture

You got to love Youtube. I was bored the other night so i started watching the Real L Word on there. It's interesting to watch these 30 yr old lesbians. The one thing that catches my attention though is all the labels they give each other. It's like your not just a lesbian there's a subcategory you can be placed in. I've heard of fem, lipstick, butch, dyke, bulldyke. Then there's tops and bottoms. It just all makes you think, where do I fall in?
I wouldn't call myself a fem because I don't tend to where make up or dress up but I'm also by no means butch. I just like to wear jeans and a t-shirt. Nothing baggy either, I like fitted clothes. I like dresses but i rarely wear them because i prefer tennis shoes over heals. I don't feel girly enough though to be considered a lipstick lesbian.
Hell I don't really consider myself a lesbian. I've only been with one girl, who I am probably going to spend the rest of my life with so I think well I might as well just say I am since I'm going to end up with her. But then I still do find guys attractive. And though I've dated guys in the past I never had a connection with any of them as intense as I currently have with my girlfriend. The best explanation for this I can find is something I heard once "you don't fall in love with a sex you fall in love with a person". If it happens to be a girl so be it.


Ambition15's picture

I don't think anyone

I don't think anyone actually falls 100% into one of those categories. Like me I'm more girly, but give me a choice between heals and converses, I'll take the converses.

"First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they attack you, then you win." -M. Gandhi

galaga's picture

<3 Converse

I love converse though i started wearing Vans but they are pissing me off. I have to crouch a lot at work so they get creased a lot and now they are coming apart, my converse are more durable.

lamb_da's picture

Same :P I suppose people

Same :P I suppose people just feel better when things are categorized :T

You're so beautiful, you made me forget my pick up line. ;)

radiosilence95's picture

I've never really understood

I've never really understood the little subcategories of gay. I'm a lesbian. End of story. Why do I have to be a butch, fem, dyke, or whatever? It's just like putting high schoolers under a category, like nerd, emo, jock, or whatever. I don't want to have an official label. I don't want to be butch, fem, dyke, or any of the aforementioned things. I just want to be Jenna.

Uncertain's picture

Labels kind of arose out of

Labels kind of arose out of convenience... but when people become stuck in one it's just an even bigger inconvenience.

I think the ironic thing is gay people are so against homophobia (and therefore discrimination), but they are also the one of the most superficial and fastest to label and judge others (this is mostly about the gay males on the gay scene).

Super Duck's picture

The labels confuse me super

The labels confuse me super badly because I've heard different definitions for the ones I could fall in, and depending on the definition, I'm a different one, so it's like wtf.

Fems and lipstick lesbians are both feminine girls who like girls. This is me. I've heard that fems are basically just average feminine girls, and lipstick lesbians are like, supermodel-level of feminine. In that case, I'd fall into the fem category. But I've also heard from other sources that fems are the ones who are usually attracted to more masculine girls, while lipstick lesbians are the ones who are usually attracted to other feminine girls. In that case, I'd be a lipstick lesbian... So I don't understand?

galaga's picture


lol yeah that does sound all confusing. I don't have many lesbian friends so I know nothing about specifics. Hmmm maybe I should try Wikipedia...

lamb_da's picture

Let's just go with the

Let's just go with the umbrella term of queer ;P

You're so beautiful, you made me forget my pick up line. ;)

galaga's picture

I don't know why but when I

I don't know why but when I think of queer I think of guys

lamb_da's picture

Because the word is

Because the word is associated more with gay males :/ but I like queer because it means gay AND weird. And I'm both, so it works.

You're so beautiful, you made me forget my pick up line. ;)