as you bind me up in ropes, i wonder, "will you need me, (always), the way you do now?"
has there been no meaning? i remember your drunk, (sorry) ass, how i fucked you. you didn't care so neither did i. it hurt so i made you hurt, i covered your mouth with cotton. you hurt so much and i liked it. revenge for making me feel weak, a small consolation (prize) from the universe for my uselessness and stupidity. but it felt (good) for once so i took it, selfish as always.
it was stupid to seek purification, i have crossed the path of no return, (impure). such treatments are for the strong, the beautiful, they are things which my body cannot give to my soul, graced as it is with vileness. it is bland and boring, scars and (old) wounds hidden beneath skin. it cannot be, simply.
nothing remains but you, and even you slip away from me, distant and binding. it was too bright, it will have to burn and choke. humiliate me as you go (what could be more divine?)